It’s been a crazy couple of weeks for us, the reason being that I’ve started looking for a new job. That alone would be plenty stressful. Most of the phone calls and interviews I’m doing end up being scheduled during the day, which piles onto the stress. I work midnights, remember, so I’m usually sleeping until the early afternoon at the least. A phone interview scheduled for 2 p.m. is just like waking up a normal person at four in the morning for a job interview. It should be pretty obvious why I’m grumpier than normal and my sex drive is running a little low.

It’s not all stress and madness, though. ML and I had a really good laugh at a really dumb thing I did, which helped lighten up the mood a bit.

I had a phone interview with an HR person at one of the places I was applying for. The conversation went pretty well, and we left off with the woman getting back to me at a later time to schedule a second interview.

I hung up my phone and went into the other room to let ML know the good news about the interview. I was feeling pretty good about things as I gave her the rundown of what we talked about, After a bit of explaining, I joked around a bit and started coming up with really stupid things to say that would make me sound like a crazy person. These things included (but were not limited to) pretending all I cared about was the money as well as speaking in hashtags. One example that ML and I couldn’t stop laughing at was “hashtag cheddar!” Then I joked around by looking at my phone and pretending that the phone wasn’t hung up.

I looked at my phone, and the phone wasn’t hung up.

A check of my recent call log showed that I had made TWO phone calls – the original call, and a second one immediately after that apparently consisted of me talking like an idiot and shouting out “HASHTAG CHEDDAR” while my wife and I laughed hysterically. Either this woman sat there and listened to me make an ass out of myself, or there was a 4 minute long voicemail on her phone waiting to be listened to.

Naturally, I freaked out.

After a few minutes of testing, it seemed as though my hashtag-speak wasn’t audible in the way I was holding the phone. That seems to be the case, as I have spoken to this woman again a few more times, and she hasn’t mentioned it at all. So either I got away with a huge near-fuck up, or she’s waiting to spring this on me during the salary negotiations in order to lowball me.