It seems strange to describe my current situation as “chastity” since I haven’t been wearing the cage for M for quite some time now. But it does apply, sort of, once you understand the thought process (and potential sequence of events involved).
You see, even though I haven’t been wearing the cage for M, we still haven’t had penetrative sex of any kind for a very long time – on the scale of months, at least (not even considering M’s recent recovery time). So while I may not be in physical chastity, I’m still being kept denied. And yes, I know… this isn’t “chastity” in its strictest sense. But we have discussed plans for reducing the sensations that my cock experiences in different ways.
We have talked about a possible future where my cock gets minimal to no “skin to skin” contact – either I’m only allowed to be touched through clothes, with sex toys, or with gloved/covered hands. I will be denied the warm touch that I will soon grow to crave; only allowed the feeling of cold, clinical plastic or latex. Perhaps M will make me earn physical touch on my cock… or perhaps deny me indefinitely….
At the time, following through on this idea is not feasible. But the idea is out there… and it does get me aroused any time I think about it. Why does the idea of my cock not receiving any real physical stimulation for unknown and extended periods of time? I’m not quite sure. I guess it’s the same thing that excited me about wearing the cage for M – it’s the control, the denial, and the eventual desperation of needing something so badly that I can’t have. What would I do to get what I’m so desperate to have?
There may be a point in time when I find out the answer to that question.
I think what you describe is hotter than a cage for many reasons. For me, it all falls under “erotic denial”. I’ve been interested in erotic denial much longer than cage style devices have been available. The fantasy of an inescapable device is hot, but the reality of a relationship so intimate that you can up up with so many unconventional understandings and practice is much hotter.
For various reasons (some might be similar to yours) we’ve had less penetrative sex lately too. Over the weekend, I wore tights with a full spandex body briefer and we took turns playing with a vibrator while talking. I had a very smooth front. I asked her not to make me climax but eventually she made me release. It was the strongest climax I’ve had in a long time and the most delighted I’ve seen her. She enjoyed my frustration.
Afterwards, she pondered whether it’s just best to have sex that way. It took me a long time to understand that “intimacy” and closeness is the hottest element. I want to feel closer more than anything and there are reasons why I feel closer to her when being unconventional. Part of it is me being more equipped to live in moment.
Do you find your focus shifting from what you “can’t have” to the experiences you “can have”?
Not at the moment, but it’s possible this will start happening when focus can return to those types of things. For now, we are more focused on M’s health and recovery. But it’s a very exciting idea!
Thanks so much for the comment!