The other day Cagedmonkey posted an update about our current chastity and denial situation. We had mentioned that starting at his birthday he’d locked for an extended period and denied for a hell of a lot longer. Well, like he updated, the whole lock up thing didn’t go as planned!
If you know my history at all, you know around 3 weeks of having him locked, I start to desperately miss that big cock and feeling it inside me. Well, CM had only been locked 2 weeks when we went to NY for the weekend. We had such an amazing weekend, so loving and sexual and teasy and by the time we got home I was really missing the feeling of his cock, so while I wasn’t planning on having him out, in the heat of a very sexy moment I made him get out of his cage – that was a huge feat since he was rock hard in that cage – and give me the cock I so desperately needed. 🙂
Then comes the next day… I felt so bad, I felt like I’d let him down because I know sometimes we talk about pushing further or doing things longer, harder, more intense and I just couldn’t. There comes this point where I need to feel that connection with him physically and emotionally. Where I need to have him completely and without a cage in between us. However, I still felt bad and like I wasn’t good enough. I got into the “I’ll never be able to give him what he wants” thoughts and I’m worthless, yadda yadda yadda.
The point of this post is to let other women know that this happens… The most important reason for this post is to remind women we are in charge and ultimately we decide when, if and how our guys are locked up and even more importantly, this post is to remind everyone how important communication is. When I started to feel this way I told Cagedmonkey, right away, how I was feeling. I didn’t want it to continue to grow when it was much easier to talk about and work through and not put my feelings on him. I certainly can feel like I’m letting him down but knowing that he’s not let down and that he’s all good with what happened, and good with whatever happens, makes getting through the feelings that much better.
My Queen has similar feelings to you. I recently went 485 days without orgasm and was supposed to wait an additional 200 plus days before I came but my Queen was starting to feel disconnected from me. So she decided I would cum. And I did—but it was totally at her request and desire. She needs to see and feel me cum periodically to stay fully connected. Likewise, she needs to feel Angus inside her regularly. Toys and dildoes don’t do it for her in general. She likes the real thing. So she’ll have Angus do his duty regularly.
Exactly! Thanks for your comment.
Your passion for chastity is rare, hot and impressive. It’s unusual to find someone as engaged as you. When I get myself psyched up for a long period of denial, I get anxious I will have a let down if I don’t make “goals”. You guys seem to handle that well. Lately, my key holder and I have focused on denial by “tapering” things off over long run rather than being too pure. Has worked well and encouraged a little experimentation.
Hi there and thanks for your comment!
I’m curious, how are you tapering things off?
I used to get very focused on how long I could go without a “release” above anything else. I liked the hormonal impact. I didn’t necessarily appreciate how much a key holder might like being in “control” versus long term denial. We’ve been playing on and off for a really long time (like 20 years) and now we are a little older and still trying new things. All of the below involve some form of denial but not “total” denial.
Overall reduction per month or year—-I’ve been trying to have few orgasms each month and not getting too upset if we “start over” especially if a week or more goes by.
Ruined orgasms—I used to think this wasn’t “pure” enough. Now I see how it can be very frustrating and put me back on track quicker. Some months, half of my orgasms are ruined.
Penetration without male orgasm—can be difficult to stay disciplined in moment, but we did this last night. It’s another story, but orgasms haven’t always come easy to my wife. Last night, she had a very strong one and then let me have sex for only a few seconds. It takes a lot of communication.
Humiliation—I get to orgasm, but only with some form of humiliation. I have a panty fetish. She made me come in them at a kinky club.
Limiting some forms of orgasms—MB and BJs have been off table and denied a really long time (months). I haven’t MB for 4 months.
Toys—she didn’t think she liked vaginal stimulation from toys, but we’ve been experimenting and she’s been surprised to her delight.
Watching – I’ve had to watch her with women while being mostly ignored.
I still find long term, total denial very hot, but each of the above allow her to toy with me, while making me give up some aspect of pleasure or control.
Such a great description, thanks so much for taking the time to write that! 🙂
One other thing is role playing in heat of moment. When we have sex, we play up that it “isn’t something we should be doing” and “it’s one last time before being cut off”. It makes the sex forbidden and hot, and somehow works in the denial even though we are breaking the denial.
That’s an interesting little thing to add in to give play a little more oomph! I like it!
Thank you. Love your blog! Please keep it up. It brightens our day. 😛
Awww I’m so glad, thank you for reading!