orgasm denial

All posts tagged orgasm denial

As far as fetishes and kinks go, male chastity can be very diverse. Many things can be added to or augmented to chastity; no two experiences will be exactly the same. What I’ve found is that chastity has opened up many different areas of kink to My Lady and me. There are things we thought we’d never try that we found were a huge turn on for both of us.

Last night at work, ML and I were having one of our “remember when” discussions about  the time she fulfilled my rape fantasy. I was amazed at how incredible the experience was, and how much I enjoyed it… after the fact, of course! As we were talking, we began to brainstorm about how to take it to the next step. As we were considering a lengthier scene, ML writes me the following text:

“Not too tough with enough time to spread it out. Like being kidnapped, kept, and repeatedly raped, hehe.”

My jaw literally dropped.

And my cage immediately got tighter.

What a GREAT IDEA!!!!!

We spent the next two hours, tossing around ideas for how to draw it out, including but not limited to: sending the kids to a multi-day camp, so she could abuse me over the course of days; cuffing me in various positions in various places around the house; blindfolding me, and using a variety of toys on me without warning; fucking my ass with the strap on, or toys of her choosing as I lick her pussy; leaving me restrained while she goes to rest, returning later to continue her assault; riding my cock while shoving a dildo up my ass; keeping the tease up while the kids are home, sneaking into the kitchen when I’m alone and roughly fingering my ass, giving me no place to hide; and so on.

Needless to say, my cock was trying its best to get hard. In vain, of course, pushing against the walls of the Revenge. But DAMN, was it hot. It was turning us both on! I have a feeling this will happen sometime in the future. 

It really is amazing that My Lady and I can discuss these dark desires with each other, without worrying about how the other will react. We made a promise to each other when we started this to be honest and open about any fantasies we have, no matter how out there they may seem. How else would we know if we liked something or not without trying it first?

I know all you guys out there always say that I’m the luckiest guy in the world, and I really am…. but not for the reasons you think. It’s not because My Lady locks up my cock for weeks on end, denying me orgasm until I’m insane with need, teasing me mad until I’m about to explode. It’s because I have a partner who loves me, respects me, and cares for me enough to allow me to trust her with anything and everything that is inside me without fear. And she has the same thing in me. THAT is why I’m so lucky.

Ok, I won’t deny it… I’m pretty lucky for those other reasons, too. 🙂

imagesCAQT5Z0G

Now that I have had time to grow accustomed to the enclosed style of the Revenge, My Lady has decided to step things up to the next level. She wants me to truly feel as if my cock has been isolated from myself. What does this mean for me?

It means I won’t get to touch or even see my cock again until My Lady allows it.

We have talked about this for a while, and it’s a very exciting idea for both of us. My cock will stay locked in the Revenge, out of touch and out of sight (the Jailbird’s open style allowed me to see and touch my cock, just not get hard). When ML wants to take her toy out and play, or removes the device to perform shaving/cleaning/other types of maintenance, I will be blindfolded and cuffed or otherwise restrained. There will not be a moment when my cock is out and my hands and eyes are free, and vice versa.

(Caveat: My Lady is going to do her best to fulfill this, but due to her shoulder still not being 100% she may need a minimal amount of help from me. The spirit of the idea will still be followed as much as possible)

I really don’t know how I’m going to be affected by this.

These rules have only been in effect for the last day or so, so it hasn’t had a chance to really set in yet. ML hasn’t had to remove the cage yet, so I haven’t had a “see no penis, feel no penis” episode so far. But when that first one comes, I’m pretty sure it’s going to be mind blowing. Will I feel like it’s not even mine anymore, since I can’t see it or touch it? My Lady will truly be in control of my cock during that time, and I will fully depend on her for any sensation I would receive.

How bad will it get? My Lady knows I have a tendency to try bargaining when I’m really desperate. Will I begin to bargain just for a glimpse of my cock? What will I be willing to give up for it?

I can’t wait to find out!

milking-by-hand

This morning, My Lady came upstairs to tuck me into bed, and soon things took a turn for the frisky. I could feel her dominant streak starting to grow. It wasn’t long before she was telling me the things she was going to do to me, the ways she was going to use me.

It was time for her to go out and run some errands, and leave me at home to sleep. But she decided to make things just a little more difficult for me – we have a vibrating butt plug that has works on a number of different speeds and patterns with the push of a button. She got the plug from our toybox in the closet and began to rub it up and down her pussy lips. Then, using only her pussy juices as lube (OMG fucking hot!), she slid the plug into my ass and turned on the vibration.

Immediately I began moaning and squirming on the bed. She told me to keep my phone handy because she’d be texting me during the morning when she wanted me press the button to change the pattern. And off she went, leaving me with a vibrating ass, unable to lie still.
 
I laid in my bed over the next couple of hours, softly moaning as the plug vibrated my ass, ML texting me every so often to change the pattern. Every once in a while, my entire body would jerk and spasm in response to the unyielding vibration. I began to feel a building pressure in my balls, a pressure I had felt before. It felt like…
 
It felt like I needed to pee.
 
I get this feeling usually when ML is toying with my ass, but the strongest I’ve ever felt this sensation was when My Lady milked me for the first time. Was this what was happening to me? Or was I about to piss all over the bed? I had no idea! I frantically texted ML, begging for permission to turn the plug off, because I was unsure what might happen next due to the sensations I was having.
 
Her text message response:
Nah, little slutty boys who like their asses played with get to sleep in their own mess 😉
 
I then asked if I could at least put a towel down, but she refused. She told me to just let it happen, if I ended up peeing the bed it wouldn’t hurt or kill me. Then she told me she would be in a store for the next twenty minutes and not to bother her until she texted me back.
 
I tried like hell to hold it in, but the vibrations would not let up. I felt the pressure building and building inside me, until it was nearly unbearable. I was feeling as if I was about ready to burst, causing me to moan out loud once again. Then I heard My Lady’s words in my head… let it happen
 
So I did. I lifted my hips from the mattress, my ass in the air, and tried my hardest to relax my muscles.
 
Two seconds later, I heard the sound of something dripping on the sheet.
 
I looked down between my legs, and clear liquid was literally POURING out of my cock from inside the cage. “Oh God, please no,” I moaned. Still dripping, I reached down, afraid to smell urine on my hand, but I didn’t. The fluid was clear and had no scent to it. Thankfully, it wasn’t pee. The vibrating butt plug milked me, and VERY effectively at that!
 
After a few more seconds and I was fully drained, I reached down once again to survey the damage. Holy fuck… there was a 4-5 in wide puddle on the mattress, completely soaked through! My balls must have been completely emptied, without any orgasmic feelings for me. It was equal parts humiliating and exciting. I always liked the idea of being milked by ML, my cum being drained from my body without giving me pleasure. It involves such a deep level of control that she can extract my cum yet still control my orgasm. But this was something else; ML somehow managed to milk me without even being in the house! What the fuck?!?!?!?
 
I sent ML about six frantic texts about how I think I accidentally milked myself, that the bed was a soaked mess, what should I do, but she didn’t respond. So I put my phone down on the nightstand… now what? Once again, I heard the words of My Lady in my head… slutty boys who like their asses played with get to sleep in their own mess…. I knew what i had to do.
 
The puddle was cold and slightly sticky by the time I laid back down. God, how embarassing, sleeping in a puddle of my own cum that I didn’t even get an orgasm with. It was once again difficult to lie still, this time because my cock was SCREAMING for attention. I really wanted/NEEDED to hump the mattress and cum, but couldn’t obviously because of the cage. I eventually did end up falling asleep, only waking up when ML came into the bedroom when she returned home. After checking out the sheets for herself, she hugged me and told me how amazing it was that I listened to her and just “let it happen.”
 
And you know what? It felt good for her to say that. It was not easy to allow that to happen to me, but I trusted her and went along with it. I put myself through some pretty embarassing and uncomfortable stuff, simply because she demanded it. It felt great to be controlled like that. But the best part was that I could tell she appreciated the fact that I followed through on her desires. That is the essence of submission, I think – allowing yourself to be controlled by your dominant, and experiencing the appreciation that s/he has for your submission.
 
Now, of course, I can’t wait until ML milks me again in person. I want to hear her talk dirty to me while she does it, call me a dirty boy for making a mess. I want to hear her reaction when my cum starts pouring out. I think she will really enjoy it, and that humiliation/excitement feeling will go off the charts for me!

I’m currently well into my third week of orgasm denial, and My Lady is really starting to hit her stride. The more desperate and needy I get, the more she enjoys teasing me. And the more she teases me, the more desperate and needy I get. And the more desperate and needy I get…

ML gave me a thorough teasing last night, testing the strength of the Revenge in the process (stay tuned for a device review, coming soon!). She cuffed my hands to the bed, which she said made her start getting wetter almost instantly. She really does love to restrain me! It gives her the opportunity to completely control me as she drives me crazy with need. With my hands secured, she began to tease me with her perfect tits, pulling in close to me but keeping her cleavage just out reach of my tongue. I could smell her scent and it drove me wild. She rubbed her nipples over my lips, making it clear I was NOT allowed to lick or suck them. She even stuck her nipples into my mouth, making me moan and wish she would let me suck on them.

She got off of me and reached into our “toybox” to get the nipple clamps. She put them on my nipples, and I had to breathe to fight past the initial sharp pain. When she tugged on the chain lightly, I could feel the surges of pain translating into pulses of an attempted erection in my cock. I was already throbbing in my cage, and ML wasn’t even near finished with me.

She took her magic wand – which is ALWAYS plugged in now, by the way – placed it under my balls, and turned it on. My body jumped and lurched as the vibrations shook me to the core. I couldn’t help but move my hips in small fucking motions, my body desperately searching for some sort of orgasm after being denied for so long. The vibrating continued as ML climbed on top of me to put those hip motions to good use.

My Lady took the cage inside her and began fucking her pussy with it. I couldn’t believe it – I couldn’t feel a thing! I had to ask her if I was inside! The steel tube of the Revenge cut off all sensation and contact with my cock. It was so unfair to watch ML take her orgasm after all of the ones she’s been having lately, while I was denied even the pleasure of feeling her warm wet pussy on my cock. I whimpered and began to pull my hands up, wanting to touch her, squeeze her tits, hold her close to me, get ANY sensation I could to fill the void that the Revenge created.

When My Lady came while riding me, my body tried as hard as it could to join her. Obviously, without any sensation on my cock the efforts were futile, but my muscles still tensed up and my hips lurched upwards as if the rest of my body didn’t care. My body needs to cum so badly that it is trying to do so on it’s own now, apparently. 🙂

After her orgasm, My Lady climbed off of me and began to massage my entire body, focusing on my legs and feet. Her fingers pressed deep on my muscles, and my body responded with more of the tense squeezing as before. I would have curled up into a ball if I wasn’t spread out and cuffed to the bed. Instead, my arms tugged against the restraints as the rest of my body trembled and shook uncontrollably.

Finally, ML removed the wand from under my balls. I breathed a sigh of relief, but then I realized what she was doing. I moaned loudly as she laid back next to me, spread her legs wide (draping one over my stomach, even) and began rubbing her pussy with the wand. She moaned louder and louder as I heard the sounds of her wetness being vibrated by the wand. Then, she took the wand and pushed the vibrating head into her pussy! “Oh, fuck,” was all I could say as she fucked the wand, moving her hips up to meet it in mid-thrust. Then she began alternating between rubbing her pussy lips and clit with the wand, until she began to cum, loudly and intensely.

I’m not kidding, My Lady rode her orgasm for about two solid minutes before she slumped down and relaxed on the bed. The entire time she was struggling to hold back her screams of passion (barely succeeding), and I could see her thigh muscles pulsing and tensing up with each orgasmic jolt. I was equal parts happy for her and jealous, wanting a body-racking intense orgasm of my own to enjoy.

That feeling has been creeping up a lot lately – envy. I’m envious of My Lady for being able to cum at any and all times of the day, whenever she desires, and as intensely as she does as well. She gets more than her fill of it, while my body sits and waits for its chance. I hunger for my orgasm. My balls constantly feel swollen and sensitive, itching for the chance to drain themselves of weeks of backed up cum. These feelings force me to contemplate my denied state every minute of the day without one moment of reprieve. I don’t see how this feeling could get any more difficult for me to deal with than it is right now.

The reaction I had while tied up and teased has been more and more frequent – I call them “bodygasms,” although the more proper term is most likely “sympathetic orgasms.”  It’s really crazy, feeling my body behave like in that way and having no power to control or stop it. I can only assume that my brain and the rest of my body is tired of waiting and is making it’s own “body-gasms” and leaving my cock behind. I can’t blame them; I’d cum any way I could right now if it were plausible.

cagedmonkey: I’m being hit pretty hard by the “I want to be out” and “I just need to feel your pussy around my cock” feelings lately. Apparrently, the ways you’ve been teasing me over the past week have been damn effective.

Lady:Awww, I get those feelings too, wanting you inside me. I just know the longer you stay locked in your cage the better it’s going to be on my birthday. I’m loving the effect this is having on you.

cm: Yeah, that… I don’t know why I’m having such a rough time this time around. I was perfectly fine starting out after Valentine’s Day, but ever since our adventures in alcohol I’ve been on edge. It could be the two weeks of denial I’ve built up, but it’s not even cumming that I’m obessing over. It’s feeling your pussy around my hard cock. I’m needing it bad!

Lady: Awww aren’t you cute, wanting to feel my tight pussy squeeze your big hard cock. You know, there’s always a chance I could let you feel my pussy. Realistically, you will be out of your cage at least a couple times. We’ll see if I can resist. 🙂

cm: Well, technically I have felt your pussy on my cock… the few times you’ve let me in your pussy with the cage on! It seems to me, though, that we are back on track for having me locked up until your birthday pretty much 24/7 (except for maintenance issues, cage switching, etc.). Am I right about that?

Lady: Yes, you are right about that. 🙂 I’m sure there will be a couple of times you’ll be out by then for a good cage cleaning and a good shave. Though the shaving thing with the cage on I’ve got down. And I am really loving what it does to you when I get that cage inside me and especially if I cum around it. It must be super frustrating to barely feel me like that.

cm: It really is. Being that close to something I want where I can feel it, but I can’t have what I want is KILLING ME! My balls are feeling full and swollen, my cock aches nearly constantly, and I can’t help but get turned on when I simply look at you! The chastity effects are coming down full force on me this time around, and it’s your teasing and control that is causing it.

 
Lady: I really am loving how horny you are this time. I love your reactions. I’m getting so turned on myself because you are reacting so strongly to my teasing. You’re much more sexually charged and “hair trigger” and those reactions are boosting my self esteem and make me actually feel it when you say I’m sexy, beautiful or amazing. Can you see why I want to keep you locked up and on this path? I don’t want to lose how good it feels with you in this mega horny state. That’s why I want to keep you locked so long this time, to see just how “hair trigger” you can get. I know you want to be my good boy and wait for that, right? 😉

cm: Honestly? YES!!! It’s starting to become difficult to maintain my sanity, but that’s okay. I know that you are worth the wait and that you will make it worth the wait when it is over. And you are definitely worth submitting to. I wouldn’t have it any other way!

Lady: Awww look how sweet my boy is… you are a smart boy and you’re right, it’s all going to be worth it. Feeling my tight pussy wrapped around your cock in April is going to be amazing!

I’m glad your so obsessed with feeling my pussy because, if you remember, that’s all you get then. Your next chance to cum isn’t until June. 🙂

Boy, oh, boy is this ever going to be fun! 🙂

On Sunday night, My Lady and I sat down together for a few drinks while watching some TV together. We probably should have prepared a little more for the drunkenness ahead, because in the past these types of “drinking nights” have led to weaknesses in ML’s resolve. In other words… when we get drunk together, we usually end up fucking no matter what the chastity situation is. Sometimes I’m a good boy and I hold back when ML denies me. Sometimes ML needs to feel it and she allows me to cum inside her. We felt that we had some added extra security, knowing that it was ML’s time of the month. Would this time be different? Well…

After a few drinks, kisses, and horny touches, My Lady began to tell me how badly she wanted to have a nice hard cock inside her. I told her I’d be happy to oblige, but I couldn’t unless she released me. At first she shook her head and told me that I should go get the strap on instead, but then she seemed to soften up a bit. She talked about how she really did miss my cock, the hardness of my shaft combined with the softness of my skin. Then I asked her the fateful question of the night…

“Would you be mad if you happened to pass out drunk, if I unlocked myself and fucked you?”

And she thought about it!

This comes back to a post ML wrote about whether or not she wants me to disobey her. We’ve talked about it before, and so I kinda already knew where she stood. But I had to ask anyway.

She responded with a long “Hmmmmm…”

Then she reached behind her neck and took the chain that holds my key off of her neck. I looked at her with a confused and excited face. “If you’re going to do it, I figured I’d start you off. But you gotta get me to drink more first.” She smiled at me. I jumped off the couch and poured her another glass of wine. While I was up, she also told me to get a porn DVD that we got for free with an online sex toy purchase.

WTF??? We’re going to watch porn together? I thought. But there was no way I was going to argue. I popped the DVD in and we started to watch.

We watched the first few scenes, and slowly both of us began to realize something – the movie wasn’t all that great. I mean, yeah, it was porn, so we were both getting horny… but it could have been so much better. The girls were obviously faking it (except for one girl-on-girl scene, one of the chicks was REALLY getting into it, you could tell!), and the guys were not even doing a good job with their dicks. I said casually to ML, “Man, I could fuck you so much better than that and make it look so much better.”

She whispered in my ear, “Oh yeah? Show me.” My eyes shot wide open. I asked if she was sure; she nodded. In an instant, the key was in my hand working on the security screw on my Jailbird. My cock sprang out and was fully hard in seconds.

So much for being locked in the cage 24/7 for two months!

I was ready to fuck her immediately, only one problem – the dreaded cycle. What to do? My Lady had a wonderful suggestion:

“Why don’t you just fuck my ass?”

Well then! Sounds like a plan to me!

I lubed us both up and slowly slid my cock into her tight ass. We both moaned loudly as I sunk in further. I was still wearing the ring of the Jailbird, so my cock was extra full and hard, and she definitely felt the difference. I fucked her ass slowly, making sure not to cum and ruin the ENTIRE chastity plan and start over at square one. But as we went on, the alcohol started to get my head swimming, which pushed my urge to cum at bay. Soon I was fucking her pretty hard in the ass, and she was loving it.

We stopped, and we planned to take a shower together. I stood up and ML went to get the DVD out of the player, which is located on a floor level compartment of our entertainment center. All of a sudden, the animal in me took over and I came up behind her and shoved my cock back into her ass. She moaned and squealed in that sexy “give it to me harder” way, so I did. HARD. FUCKING HARD. I pounder her until her face was pressed into the carpet. I pulled her hair as I thrusted into her. I slammed my cock into her as I spanked her ass and called her my anal fuck slut. And she loved every moment, asking for it harder and deeper. She really is an amazing woman. 🙂

After washing off in the shower together, we staggered into the living room to remove all evidence of our alchohol/porn fueled sex romp (just in case the kids woke up early the next morning, lol). We snuggled in bed together, sans clothes and sans cage. It was wonderful.

The next morning, we got out of bed. ML looks at me and seriously asks me, “Did you fuck my ass last night?”

“Uhhhh, yeah!” I replied. “You don’t…”

She shook her head.

She didn’t remember ANY of it! She remembered the drinking and porn parts, but drew a total blank on the ass fucking!* I told her that was fucking hot, and she smiled a huge smile at me. I put my cage back on before heading downstairs, the two month plan destroyed but the four month plan very much still in play. And I ended up getting something I was craving very badly, but still I’m denied and needing to cum bad.

*Note: when ML reads this post, it will probably be the first time she hears about what happened. I didn’t give her many details when she asked what happened. So, look for her in the comments. She may have some interesting things to say about being my “anal fuck slut” for a night!

What a wonderful weekend My Lady and I had! We had a lot of fun at the casino, outside of the lots of sex we ended up having. 🙂

We checked into the hotel on Saturday afternoon. At first, we intended to just drop off our stuff and head to the casino for some gambling fun, but that plan went into the trash once we got inside the room. My Lady unlocked me once we were inside the room; we started kissing and we couldn’t hold ourselves back. All of the fun ideas My Lady had of teasing me and making me work for my orgasm went out the window – we got undressed from the waist down only, and started making love not five minutes after we walked through the door. I was filling My Lady’s pussy with cum in VERY short order, and her pussy quivered around my cock as she joined me in orgasm.

It was fantastic! After waiting nearly a month, it felt great to cum. The orgasm itself was amazing, but also the feeling of not having to hold back during the buildup and just let loose was absolutely wonderful.

After our quickie, we went down to the casino floor for some gaming fun. My Lady and I bled away some money at the slots before heading to the poker room. We had a lot of fun playing poker – My Lady may have had a little too much fun, along with a little too much alcohol, hehe – even though neither of us was doing very well. I’m the poker player of the pair of us, but My Lady was doing better than I was because I couldn’t get any fucking cards whatsoever….. but I’m not mad about it.  🙂

After we were both pretty well supplied with alcohol, we stumbled back up to our room once again. We stripped down and jumped in the bed with each other. This time, we fucked…. drunk fucked. It was soooo nice – I grabbed My Lady’s ass as I thrusted deep into her and filled her up with another load of my cum. My Lady later admitted that she didn’t remember us having sex this time, which she found very exciting. 🙂

My Lady had me jerk myself off once and we had sex one more time before we had to check out the following morning. It felt great to have some spontaneous, unplanned sex after being in chastity for so long.

My last orgasm came this morning: I woke up My Lady by rubbing her wet pussy – I wonder what she was dreaming of! I rolled over on top of her and slid myself inside her, slowly taking her, making it last because I knew it could very well be my last for quite some time. We both came together again – I love it when we do that! We had a few minutes to cuddle before the kids woke up and ran into the room. So much for our fantasy weekend.  🙂

Later in the morning, My Lady told me it was time to “get dressed.” I know what that means; at the next opportunity, I snuck off to the bathroom, tucked my cock into the Jailbird, and tightened the security screw. I was locked in, where I belong. And here I sit, still locked in, and tomorrow begins over two months of near-24/7 chastity and 4 months of orgasm denial. Honestly? I’m glad and excited to get started. This will be a huge milestone for us in our chastity lifestyle.

Talk to me in a few weeks, though… that feeling may change drastically by then. 😉

(Okay, no kidding… “The Final Countdown” is actually playing as I’m writing this post! LOL)

Today is the day. Hopefully by the time you read this (or perhaps even as you are reading this!) I will be cumming in, on, and around My Lady’s body!

Later today, ML and I will be dropping off the kids for an overnight stay at a babysitter’s house, and we will be headed for a nearby hotel/casino for some gambling and our first overnight stay in a hotel without the children present. It promises to be a lot of fun, especially since My Lady has promised to unlock me and have tons and tons of loud, passionate sex with me! I cannot wait!

This feeling is equal parts amazing and nerve racking. It’s amazing because I really do NEED to cum at this point! In fact, tonight before I left for work, ML was teasing my cock in its cage and I was begging her to be unlocked. Any amount of time – an hour a few minutes even… I was desperate to be out of the cage. My desire to cum is even worse than the desire to get hard, but I needed at least one of the two. Finally having an orgasm after about a month of going without is going to be a relief like I have never felt before!

On the other hand… I know what is waiting for me after this weekend. My Lady has laid out the plans for me already – I will be locked 24/7 for two whole months until her birthday. No erections, no time out of the cage. My cock will be encased in steel until April. And looking past that, I will be denied orgasm for at least four months until my birthday in June. I have no idea how I will be able to get through it. Going one month was hard; going four months might just turn me into a desperate, begging, pleading puddle of need! It just might break me! But it is what My Lady wants, so it is what My Lady gets.

Oh yeah, did you notice, by the way… I said “at least four months”? Yes… I’m not even guaranteed an orgasm on my birthday! According to ML, if she is well satisfied (which I always make sure she is) and if she enjoys my desperation enough (which I assume she will, seeing how she reacted to my state during this period of denial), she may decide to extend my denial even further. Fireworks on July 4th? Possibly. Even farther than that? She didn’t rule it out. When I asked if I was going to cum again this year at all… even then, she was non-committal.

Looks like I better enjoy myself this weekend while I can. Who knows when I will get my next chance?

My Lady and I were texting each other last night while I was at work, and the conversation wandered to the topic of sensory deprivation. You see, ML has been doing some research in that area, specifically sensory deprivation hoods. And when ML starts doing research, you know that she’s getting serious about it.

She began to text me some of the ideas that have been popping up in her head, and I couldn’t help but get turned on (which made my cock strain against the cage rather strongly). Here are just a few examples of the texts she sent me:

  • “like putting your hands in mittens behind your back, making you kneel on the floor hooded”
  • “I could open only the gag and make you choke on my dildo”
  • “I could take off the blindfold with my pussy right in your face while I cum”
  • “Put a dildo in your ass and make you sit on it while I fuck your mouth with mine”
  • “So if I told you I could put the hood on and use the face dildo as the gag piece instead and fuck your sensory deprived face, how would that make you feel?”

How would it make me feel?

Those sound like horrible, terrible things to have to endure. I don’t know if I could take it.

How would it make me feel?

I need to experience this.

That’s how it makes me feel. I can imagine myself in the moment, wanting it to end so badly, wondering why and how I got myself into this, suffering in pain and frustration. Yet it’s undeniable – I want it to happen. When I read those texts – and even now as I retype them – I get a tightness in my chest that says to me, “Oh. My. God. I NEED THIS.”

It’s scary and confusing to have these types of feelings – to want something you don’t want to happen happen, so badly. But honestly, that’s pretty much what chastity is. I’m sitting here with my cock locked in a steel cage with no way to get out on my own, and I desperately want to cum. But I want to be like this – desperate for release, yet powerless to facilitate that release, completely dependent on My Lady for any and all sources of sexual pleasure. I trust My Lady with my life; I know she will protect me and keep me safe, even when she is putting me through hell just because she can and she wants to. It speaks to my devotion to her how badly I want this to happen, even though I don’t want this to happen.

Now I’m left wondering just when she plans on putting these things in motion…

CagedMonkey and I have had a very relaxed couple weeks in the chastity device and our D/s play because our Jail Bird is in getting adjustments. The Bird Cage we use as a back up device is really showing its wear and I don’t want hubby wearing it for more time than necessary. So really he’s only been wearing it to work.

I decided, since we haven’t had any real intense teasing play lately, today would be a bit of  a dominant day. Cagedmonkey works midnights so when he got home this morning he got breakfast for the kids and then got ready for bed. He had a headache so I gave him some Tylenol and let him sleep a little before putting him through this intense ride.

I’m not sure what you would call this but today he is (trying to) sleeping unlocked, bound to the bed, gagged with a penis gag and stuffed with the njoy butt plug. While he is enduring that torture? I will be visiting very often to stroke him and edge him.

I’m sure he’s going to be very tired and worn out by this afternoon but I feel like he needed a good reminder of who is in charge of all of his pleasures & sensations.

I’m really loving the idea of sensory deprivation play and I’m working to learn how to make it happen. So for now I’m playing with sensations and making him all filled up and unable to touch or do anything about whatever I do to him. He just has to endure whatever I want to do to him because I am in control of it all. I’m even in control of how much or the quality of sleep he gets. It should be a fun day and perhaps he’ll write later about how he feels about what I’m doing to him. 🙂