torment

All posts tagged torment

My Lady and I were texting each other last night while I was at work, and the conversation wandered to the topic of sensory deprivation. You see, ML has been doing some research in that area, specifically sensory deprivation hoods. And when ML starts doing research, you know that she’s getting serious about it.

She began to text me some of the ideas that have been popping up in her head, and I couldn’t help but get turned on (which made my cock strain against the cage rather strongly). Here are just a few examples of the texts she sent me:

  • “like putting your hands in mittens behind your back, making you kneel on the floor hooded”
  • “I could open only the gag and make you choke on my dildo”
  • “I could take off the blindfold with my pussy right in your face while I cum”
  • “Put a dildo in your ass and make you sit on it while I fuck your mouth with mine”
  • “So if I told you I could put the hood on and use the face dildo as the gag piece instead and fuck your sensory deprived face, how would that make you feel?”

How would it make me feel?

Those sound like horrible, terrible things to have to endure. I don’t know if I could take it.

How would it make me feel?

I need to experience this.

That’s how it makes me feel. I can imagine myself in the moment, wanting it to end so badly, wondering why and how I got myself into this, suffering in pain and frustration. Yet it’s undeniable – I want it to happen. When I read those texts – and even now as I retype them – I get a tightness in my chest that says to me, “Oh. My. God. I NEED THIS.”

It’s scary and confusing to have these types of feelings – to want something you don’t want to happen happen, so badly. But honestly, that’s pretty much what chastity is. I’m sitting here with my cock locked in a steel cage with no way to get out on my own, and I desperately want to cum. But I want to be like this – desperate for release, yet powerless to facilitate that release, completely dependent on My Lady for any and all sources of sexual pleasure. I trust My Lady with my life; I know she will protect me and keep me safe, even when she is putting me through hell just because she can and she wants to. It speaks to my devotion to her how badly I want this to happen, even though I don’t want this to happen.

Now I’m left wondering just when she plans on putting these things in motion…