orgasm denial

All posts tagged orgasm denial

I must admit, I haven’t been the best sub that I can be lately.

Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t been disobedient or resistant. I haven’t been cranky or irritable. I haven’t whined or begged… too much (My Lady loves a little bit of desperation, after all!). I’ve been very giving with both my time and energy lately, doing whatever I can to please My Lady. The problem isn’t what I am doing or not doing. The problem is the reasons and motivations behind my actions.

My motivation for pleasing ML is pretty much expected at this point in my denial – I’m goddamn horny as fuck with a heaping side of blue balls. After a solid month of being teased nearly nonstop by the sexiest woman I’ve even known and not being allowed to cum, I guess I can’t be blamed much for that. But as much as ML loves the desperate state of aching horniness that I’m currently in, it sometimes works against my subby mindset. I’ll explain.

I’ve written before about how much I love to lick My Lady’s pussy. I love how she tastes, I love how her body reacts when I give her sweet kisses on her clit. I love it when she moans when I shove my tongue as far into her pussy as I possibly can. I love how her pussy walls squeeze my tongue when I wiggle it around inside her. I love how her body shudders when I swirl my tongue around her clit. And it feels great when I give her a nice, loud, intense orgasm with just my mouth.

And now here’s the problem: did you notice how many “I”s there are in that paragraph? The answer is: waaaaaaaaaaay too many.

I’ve noticed that recently I’ve been focusing too much attention on what my body needs or what my mind wants. It’s too much “me.” I’ve been asking to be unlocked a lot more often this month than I have ever before; and, although ML loves to hear me beg, I’m not so much begging but asking as if I expect a yes. Espcecially after pleasing ML in one way or another, I’m getting those “Okay, what about me?” feelings very frequently. This can’t go on.

I’ve been pleasing ML very well lately, but I’ve been doing it because I want to do it. I need to get back to pleasing her because she wants it. I need to get back to doing what she wants, not asking if I can do what I want. I need to get back to licking her pussy because it feels good for her, not because I think her pussy is delicious. And I need to get back to making her cum if and only if she demands it, not because I love to do it. I need to push my sexual needs and desires so far behind My Lady’s so that there is absolutely no question which is most important.

ML already has plans to get me moving in the right direction. After mentioning that I was off for the next two nights, she responded with this text:

Good. I’m in the mood for some ass worship. It’s been awhile since I just laid on my tummy and had you make love to my ass with your tongue.

She always knows just what I need. 🙂

It’s creeping up on a month since my last orgasm now, and I can definitely feel my horniness taking on a whole new intensity. I don’t know if it’s because ML has been teasing me out of the cage more, or if it’s the use of the super-confining Revenge, or it could just be the fact that I’m a male with an incredibly high sex drive who has gone cum-less for so long…. but I can feel the need growing. I’d never use my safeword with ML just because I wanted to cum, but this weekend for the first time I considered thinking about possibly maybe using it. It’s that bad.

And I have how much longer to go?

Actually, the answer to that question is not 100% clear. It has been somewhat assumed that my next Maybe Day is our anniversary, seeing as we go on our Carribean cruise the week following. Assumed, but not decided on. And, as always, it is ML’s choice to make whether or not I actually get to cum on any Maybe Day. I feel somewhat safe about this time around; after this, I honestly have no clue.

I can feel my sexual need starting to take over me. Any time I am close to ML, any time I look at her I get turned on. I’ve had to battle with incredibly strong morning wood just about all week, my cock filling the cage and nearly bursting through the bars of the Jailbird. And my fantasies have beginning to get very intense.

Oddly enough, this is very exciting to me. I was secretly worried that maybe I was starting to veer off of the “kink” path in some ways, but these urges show me otherwise. I’ll explain. For the past few weeks, ML has been using my face to get her horny pussy off. I am enjoying it to no end. There have been moments, however, where she gets a little overeager and covers my face with her gooey wetness enough where I am unable to breathe.  We’ve explored this before and enjoyed it very much, but recently I’ve been trying to avoid it. I don’t know why, exactly… I just wasn’t into it. But now that my uncontrollable horniness has taken over, I’m very aggreeable to whatever ML wants to do with me – whether it be smother me with her huge titties, force me to lick her pussy until my jaw aches, or queening me until I pass out tongue fucking her ass.

Even our most recent discussions about the pseudo-cuckolding fantasies are getting darker and more intense… do I really want to be locked into the steel bars and be forced to watch another man jerk off and cum all over my wife’s tits? Do I want to be teased mercilessly, edged over and over, and have to beg this man to either let me have an orgasm or allow the torment to stop?

I guess the real question is… do I want to have a choice in the matter?

I’m pretty sure I know the answer to that question.

What is a cocktease?

(n.) A Cock Tease is a woman who, from the male perspective, acts in a sexual manner with the intention of seducing a man, but without actually fulfilling the expected sexual actions.

(V.) To purposely become enticing to a male to the point of giving him a hardon, or in most cruel cases, blue balls, with no intention of follow through.

While looked at as a bad thing by some men, this is hot and exciting to those who realize the build up to orgasm is the best part of the sexual experience.

Being a cock tease comes naturally to me. I have always loved the act of seducing a man, the lead in, that build up of sexual tension. I have always been fantastic at it. It’s fun, it’s exciting, it’s a major turn on and a huge ego booster knowing that I can turn a guy on and get his cock rock hard. It’s especially hot if I can do that with my words or how I look or act. Turning a guy on and getting him hard to the point of frustration without even touching him really makes me feel powerful and in those moments, I am. I have complete control over the guy who is dangling from my sexual marionette strings. So, yes, I LOVE being a cocktease. <3

Now that I am married to a sweet, sexy submissive man who thrives on tease and orgasm denial, I get to live in that adrenaline rush from teasing a guy past the point of frustration. I get to enjoy that wonderful place of submission, that place where he is a puppet on my strings… waiting, wanting and needing me. That place where he craves me in every way, desires my attention and begs for my touch.

Having my man in chastity heightens that whole cocktease scenario. Locking your man’s cock in a cage holds that level of frustration, it keeps that feeling of arousal at a high without the let down of an orgasm. I love that I tease my husband all day, every day and keep him at the highest height of arousal possible. I know every woman out there loves when her guy is attentive, loving and romantic. When her guy is in that spot at the beginning of a relationship where he is constantly wooing her, telling her how he feels about her, how he loves her, how he wants her and how she turns him on. You know what I’m talking about, all those things a guy does just to get in your pants. It’s those things that make us women fall in love with you and desire you. Sure there are other things but, come on, you know when you are attentive and romantic to your Lady she wants you more sexually. The more a man caresses a woman emotionally, the more desire she has for him sexually.

The reason I wanted to write this post was because last night after cagedmonkey left for work I sat… alone… completely losing my horny feelings. My pussy just wasn’t all that wet anymore and my smile faded and so did those good feelings of being wanted and desired. My constant feelings of arousal were dissipating. I woke up this morning feeling disappointed because I wasn’t feeling that crazy horny feeling anymore.

I will say that I started to tingle when I got that morning text message:

Hey baby 🙂
How are you on this lovely lovely wonderful most awesomest morning, my sweet sensational love?

Eeeeeee! It only got better when the first thing that happened when he walked in the door was him stopping mid sentence to say:

Oh my God you look beautiful this morning.

Without another word or even putting his stuff down, he came over to me, put his hand around the back of my neck and kissed me as I was trying to tell him welcome home.

Seriously? Uhhhhhhhgh! That was that, my pussy got that warm tingly feeling inside and I knew I was instantly getting wet. I realized that my constant horny, crazy, neediness is fueled by my husband. It’s catapulted into the air and soars when I am with him. When he is stroking my emotions, petting them gently, he is causing a physical reaction in me. I love it more than I could possibly explain in words.

Boys, I can’t say it enough… never, never ever ever stop “dating” your Lady. Don’t ever, ever ever ever, stop “trying to get in her pants” – EMOTIONALLY! She will think you’re irresistible! She will want you, desire youand want to please you sexually more often.

It seems as though both My Lady and I are both insanely horny lately. Add the fact that I don’t have work for two days, and that means ML and I have been up to some really naughty things lately.

Last night, after the kids went to bed, ML and I were watching a little TV when she decided to unlock me and have a little fun with me. She stroked me and edged me numerous times, making it difficult for me to follow the storyline of the show… not that it really mattered to me by that time.

After the show, ML decided to give me some break time from her teasings. I decided to play some video games to get my mind off of being out of my mind horny. It worked for a few minutes, until My Lady decided that break time was over.

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As I continued playing, ML began stroking me once again. She continued to tease my quickly hardening cock, causing me to moan. When she had me rock hard and throbbing in her hands, she began to rub her palm over the head of my cock. It was amazing and agonizing at the same time – I absolutely love it when she teases and touches me, but the intense sensation delivered directly and only to the head of my cock is usually too much for me to handle in a calm, rational way.

I began whimpering and squirming around, trying to escape the sexual torture, but could not. ML continued rubbing the sensitive head of my cock, not even giving me a fraction of a second to gather myself or even take a nice deep breath. I began begging her to stop, but this only egged her on more. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she stroked my cock hard and fast right to the edge of orgasm and left me there, trembling with need and almost unable to speak.

(For those of you wondering, I actually didn’t do too badly in the game, considering the distractions… and yes, I’m that nerdy that I actually took pride in this.)

Soon it was bedtime for the horny adults in the house. ML and I snuggled up in bed, and it wasn’t long before my hard cock was deep inside her wet pussy. It was only a few minutes until ML’s pussy was squeezing my cock with orgasmic pleasure; it will be considerably longer until I get to experience the same. After ML was fully satisfied – and I was left as frustrated as ever – we snuggled up for some sleep.

And, to top off the evening with a perfect note… My Lady fell asleep holding my cock. 🙂 It was actually an amazing feeling to know how comfortable she must feel with her hand wrapped around my cock to be able to sleep like that.

I’m just starting on the third week of my current denial, and this is always the time when my horny level kicks into high gear. Add to the fact that we are starting to settle in to our new home, which gives My Lady more time to concentrate on driving me crazy and satisfying her incredible horny pussy, and it’s no mystery why I’m really feeling the frustration now.

Getting comfortable in the new apartment is allowing us to get back into our kinkiness, and it seems as if we didn’t even skip a beat. Last night, ML came into the bedroom, locked the door (YES!!!!!), and cuffed me with the bed restraints we finally got under the mattress. Then ML decided to break the toys in to our new apartment. She decided to give me a night of good vibrations – the inserted the vibrating butt plug into my ass and placed the magic wand under my balls. I was moaning within seconds.

My Lady spent the next half hour changing the vibration patterns of the butt plug and moving the wand up and down the shaft of my throbbing hard cock. I just had to lay there and take it… and squirm and moan, obviously. It was maddening.

ML was grinding against my hips the whole time. Soon, my squeals and moans of frustration was too much for her to take; she needed to cum. She took the wand and used it on her clit until she was shuddering through a long, hard orgasm. There I was, my asshole quivering around the vibrating butt plug, desperate to cum; there ML was, cumming as hard as she ever has, satisfying her pussy with the vibrating wand. It was frustrating to see her cumming so hard just inches away from me like that.

After she finished her cum, she uncuffed me and told me to fuck her in her new favorite position on her back with me laying by her side. She used her wand on her clit again with my cock deep inside her and she came one again, but even harder this time – her legs locked and she lifted her feet off the bed, and I struggled to keep my cock inside her as her pussy sounded spasmed so hard around my cock that it almost pushed me out.

Once she came down, I continued to thrust into her gently. She was pretty much finished, but I felt like I couldn’t stop. I needed to cum. BADLY. I begged, I whimpered, I pleaded with her to let me cum. She stroked the hair on the back of my head and said the words I both hate and love to hear: “Not just yet, darling.” It took all of my self control to pull out before I lost control.

I’m extremely sexually frustrated after that night, as you’d expect. And this is only the beginning, I’m sure; this Friday is Date Night, and thanks to our new address we have the option of going home instead of just going out to dinner somewhere. ML is very excited about this, and I can only guess on what plans she has for me. I have no idea how my sexually tortured and frustrated body will respond. Only time will tell.

Usually I have about a week or so during the month (most of the time the week or so before I start my cycle) where I’m so crazy, mega horny that almost no amount of orgasms or sex can satisfy me. It’s that time during the month where I’m craving cagedmonkey’s nice big, thick, cock the most. I just want to feel him in my hand, my mouth, my tight wet pussy while in cumming good and hard on him, squeezing him.

For some reason this month my crazy horny time hasn’t stopped! Maybe my body is making up for the lull we had while packing and moving. I don’t know for sure but it started about two weeks ago and damn if I’m not super fucking horny STILL and I’m finishing up my cycle. It’s actually worse today than it has been. At times like these that I just love that I keep cagedmonkey denied of orgasm and “hair-trigger horny,” as I call it. When I keep him that way, it helps at times like this when I’m so fucking horny and am having a hard time being satisfied. I love having his cock stand at attention for me the moment I want to ride it and cum on it.

This morning is a perfect example of how horny I am and how I love having cagedmonkey ready on a whim. I had unlocked him Sunday night so I could tease him very intensely. I teased his cock for about an hour or so Sunday night and Monday night. I edged him over and over, stroked him until he was whimpering and begging me to stop. The first thing we did before I got out of bed this morning was make love. About an hour later I was dying to get some dick and how lucky that I have one here to use whenever I want. 🙂 I went to the bedroom with a dripping wet, horny pussy, slid my hand quietly under the blanket and woke hubby with a stroke of his cock. I love how his eyes get wide and he takes in a big breath when I startle him awake like that. It certainly didn’t take him long to get hard when I told him, “I need to fuck you right now.”

I climbed up, straddled him and rode his cock till I had a few orgasms. I’m so horny and sloppy wet this morning that we were both slippery, shiny, wet and gooey. I love seeing his cock glisten with my pussy juices. I was fucking him so hard, riding his cock, squeezing it with my intense orgasms that he began begging me to slow down and to be careful so he didn’t accidentally cum without permission. I have to admit, hearing him beg and whimper like that really got me going. It turned me on more, got me even hornier that I just HAD to twist myself off of him so I didn’t force an orgasm I’m not ready to give him yet. I love him like this way too much to give him an orgasm and have to start over building him up again.

So after I rolled off of him, I was laying there next to him for a second and realized how quivery and achy my pussy felt. I just NEEDED to cum again! I made him turn a bit sideways on the bed, while I laid on my back, and slide his cock in me so I could get myself off again on his big hard cock. I do love that position, it almost reminds me of the doggy style feeling and he can get in there nice and deep. I rubbed my clit good and fast and gave myself two fantastic back to back orgasms. The first one was so strong and intense and my whole body tensed, it surprised me and I kinda moaned out a “what the fuck?!” God damn that felt good. Ugh, I’m killing myself writing this right now haha. 🙂

About an hour after that (just as I started this post haha) I was getting myself all worked up again – it really didn’t take much. I just kept thinking about how, if my daughter wasn’t here, I would use the hell out of cagedmonkey. I have these strong feelings of wanting to use him to – try – satisfy my extreme horny. I was thinking about how I would love to straddle his face and make him lick me to a few messy, drippy orgasms. I want to make his face shine with my pussy juices from ear to ear. I thought about how I want to slide down his chest and right down onto his rock hard cock, riding him to even more orgasms. But, alas, our daughter is here doing her school work so, I’ll have to settle for sneaking in every so often and getting myself off using his body for my pleasure.

As I said when I started writing this post and got myself all worked up again I had to save it as a draft and go get myself more of his awesome cock in my pussy. I swear I’ve cum at least 8 times already in just the couple hours I’ve been awake. Ok I have to stop writing again and go get off more haha. Oh boy, I’m going to get nothing done today when I’m like this! 🙂

Well I’ve noticed each time we go through a new denial period that I get to a point where I start getting these feelings of guilt. I start feeling bad for times like this morning when I go visit hubby in the bedroom and cum over and over again until I’m a heaving, breathy, sweaty mess on the bed. 🙂 I could really feel the frustration in him, the massive amount of horny dying for some satisfaction. I could hear it in his voice, see it in his face and feel it in his touch. He’s aching for an orgasm and while I love to get him to this point, as a keyholder it can be a rough time. It’s time to get over the guilt feelings for denying him and just enjoy the frustration.

Though, these are the times us keyholders may need that little reminder that we are doing a good job, that this is what you boys want. You want to be teased, used as a sex toy and left in a puddle of precum, denied the pleasure of your own orgasm. Sometimes we just need some encouragement. A super easy way to let your Mistress/Wife/Keyholder know you are loving the anguish they are putting you through is to say thank you. It is so encouraging, not too mention pretty damn hot, too hear cagedmonkey say, “thank you for allowing me to please you My Lady while you deny me the pleasure of my own orgasm. You always know just what I need.” It really shows so much submission and let’s me know that, even if I’m being a little harsh, it’s ok because he wants my control.

Anyway, I know when I get these feelings, something I’m doing is working because the more frustrated and horny he gets, the wetter and more drippy my pussy is. The more I hear the frustration in his moans, the harder I cum. 🙂

I’m pretty smiley and excited this morning. Cagedmonkey and I finally put the under the bed restraints back under the mattress and it’s got the juices flowing! I think I’m going to make a “honey do” list of sex toys I want him to find and make accessible so that I can get back to my “all day, so sorry you can’t sleep, tease and torment sessions.” I really am missing all the wonderful, regular things we used to do. I miss hearing the anguish in his moans. Those gasps from his lips as I do something to him that he doesn’t expect or that really gets him.

I know and can feel that I am missing my dominant side when things like this morning happen. I got him all tucked in bed, ran the girl to a doctor appointment, came back home and got her started on school. While she was working I went “to snuggle with daddy,” which really means I went to tease him and get off as much as I want him to make me. 🙂 I am loving, ever so much, the fact that we have a door that closes with a lock. My kids have quickly learned to knock and I don’t have to freak out and fall off the bed if I’m in the middle of a little something. I just stop, catch my breath and talk to them. Haha

So, as I was saying (before I got side tracked lol) this morning reminded me how much I’m missing that powerful, I’m in charge, dominant feeling. That, I’ll do whatever I want to you to amuse and please myself, feeling. That, you have to take what I want to give you, feeling. I knew deep in my chest when I straddled cagedmonkey’s stomach on the bed this morning and tucked his arms under his sides and used my legs to hold them there, restraining him. I loved the look in his eyes. I felt my pussy get warmer as I got that surge of horny. I pulled my shirt up to expose my big breasts as I moved myself on his stomach and dry humped him with my clothes on. It was not long at all until I was cumming right in my pants. Cagedmonkey’s face was rubbing between my boobs though they were just there to tease him as I would not allow him to lick and he obviously couldn’t touch. He could just feel the soft skin of my breasts on his cheeks and lips and smell my wonderful scent.

I felt how wet my pussy was getting. I know it would have been dripping, sopping wet if I wasn’t wearing panties and shorts. I could feel the attempted erection under the sheet on cagedmonkey’s lower half. I knew I needed to cum again so I slid down the slightest bit and positioned my clit at the base of his cock, which I affectionately call “rooty.” I grabbed him by the wrists and held him down, pressing into the mattress. I knew I needed to feel that powerful feeling of restraining him myself. I came so fast rubbing on “rooty” and holding him down. So hard that I felt my thighs squeeze his waist, my hands grip his wrists tighter and my pussy pulsing and gushing as I orgasmed again in my pants.

God it felt so good to be in that moment with him. Taking him and using whatever part of him I wanted for my pleasure. I’m looking forward to date night on Friday and I hope to break back in the restraints and other toys I’ve been missing. I want to build my horny and my aggression the next couple days so I can take it out on him in as many ways as possible in the hour or so we will have at home alone together! I might just have to find my harness and give him a good hard pegging and REALLY get my dominant feelings back.

Thanks to the moving preparations and also my current coming-down-with-a-cold-ness, there hasn’t been all that much horny play between My Lady and me during the past week. I mean, sure, I wake up with my cock pressing hard against the bars of my cage, but I haven’t had that “I’ll run through a concrete wall to fuck you” feeling for a couple days now. I guess that’s what getting sick will do to you. Understandably, I’m just not feeling the horniness right now.

But then again, I am. The desire for my wife certainly is there, no doubt about it. In fact, even with my sinuses all stuffy and gross, I still feel a sexual connection with ML that is stronger than even before we started chastity play. We are still touching and squeezing each other whenever we can (when the eyes of children are more upon us), and when we cuddle together we both have the inescapable urge to grind together. I still feel the electricity coming off of her skin when I touch her, and I still have to take a moment and recollect my thoughts when I see that sexy ass of hers.

Could it be that the intensity of my sexual desire has been recalibrated? It seems as though even when I’m at my lowest horny point – sick, distracted, preoccupied – things are still more intense than they ever were before we started this adventure. And now when things get really intense, it’s completely off the charts crazy!

Yup… I could get used to living like this. 🙂

After cagedmonkey’s naughtiness the other night, he’s was put back in the Jail Bird. I did leave him unlocked that night for a good 24 hours or so. I had thought about locking him directly back up but I noticed some redness on the underside of his shaft and decided he needed a break from the cage. That also gave me time to use the hell out of him hehe.

As for the punishment for cumming without permission… “punishment” means different things to different people. So there is no one size fits all punishment for this type of thing. I’ve never had to actually punish cagedmonkey but rather I’ve only disciplined him with spanking, etc. When we made up our agreement we added a section for punishment/discipline and what things would be effective in what situations.

So let me clarify that this is definitely a punishable offense and not something that simply requires a “correction.” It may seem complicated but one is more of a cute “oh you naughty boy” thing, closer to funishment rather than punishment. Punishment is meant to to be something undesirable and unpleasant to the person who is being punished. For cagedmonkey, this needs to be the removal or denial of something pleasant or desirable. So cagedmonkey loves his video games and he also loves pleasing me, making me cum, etc. Any of these things being taken away would be punishment for him.

I will say I’m not completely devastated by his cumming without permission… because, to be honest, it felt so good and I loved that I had him so extremely worked up that his primal need took over. However, I would be utterly devastated if he were to cheat and cum hiding in a corner somewhere. The punishment for that is not playing… I hand him back the keys and when he can prove to me that he can be a good boy, then it might be time to play. This meant I really had to think about what punishment fit the crime, so to speak.

I decided since cagedmonkey came without permission that I would deny him MY orgasm. I figured if he had so much enjoyment out of his own then his punishment should be not getting to enjoy giving me any. So he got three days of not pleasing me, knowing that I had gone upstairs to make myself cum and he didn’t get to hear me moan, didn’t get to feel my pussy moisten, didn’t get to feel it tighten, didn’t get to taste my wonderful, yummy cum that he loves so much. Denied pleasuring the woman he loves and committed to serving and pleasing. You all know that with me being in control of when he cums, he has taken to getting his pleasure from pleasing me and giving me orgasms and servicing me sexually. Let me tell you by the second day he was already complaining about how he missed my pussy and tasting it. Awww, poor baby! 🙂

I have enjoyed myself since Thursday night, I allowed his face to be buried back in my pussy, making me cum all over his face. We also got very intimate and romantic and did make love. Sometimes the slow, deliberate strokes with eye contact can really push the emotions. I really do love him being denied and extremely horny for me. I love that he wears my little steel cage on his cock because I want him to.

Finally after a very long week of punishment, extra hours at work and not getting much time to do the sexy sexes, cagedmonkey is home for the weekend. We had a chat in text last night about how I’m in the mood to use him as my sex toy. How I want to use whatever part of him, whenever I want for my pleasure. Wanna know the best part? He’s totally in the mood to be used for my pleasure! Hehe I have loved, over the past year, how our sexual moods have been in sync. When ever I’m feeling a certain way or he’s feeling a certain way we have always been in the same mood for that particular sexual thing. It’s so awesome!! 🙂

I’m so sure there will be plenty of things to write about this weekend. Since he got home from work this morning, I’ve already woken him up a few times to get my pleasure in. Even though we will be packing and going through the house stuff, doesn’t mean I won’t call him to the bedroom or bathroom for a private moment of pussy licking and making me cum. 🙂 I may even send him there before me to get his unlocked cock good and hard and ready to dip in my tight pussy whenever I want. So much possibility for so much yummy play, all. day. long. 🙂 however I have no plans to make him cum until at least January 18th.