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What a wonderful night for some playtime! The other night after we got the kids to bed cagedmonkey and I spent a little normal, laying around on the couch time, catching up on shows. We were both starting to get tired but neither of us wanted to go to sleep. So instead we went in the bedroom to watch tv in there and see what play might happen.

I’d gotten a little excited, and tingly in the nether bits, when that afternoon my new toy was delivered. It’s a Love Rider Thruster and I’ve been very excited to try it out. It’s size seemed so perfect for pegging hubby and I especially love the non phallic-ness of it all. I’ll write more of a review on that later too with both of our points of view.
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I decided it was the perfect night to strap on my harness and, who knows, maybe I’d want to play. I can’t wait to review this harness, btw, I love it so much! Anyway, I got it on and got my new toy into it, which is amazing too! I climbed into bed next to hubby all strapped into my harness and we started to watch a little television. It actually got me kind of aroused laying there with him, pressing against him, teasing his ass crack with the probe.
2015-03-16 18.54.05I honestly didn’t last laying there beside him too long before I felt my pussy getting tingly, warm and wet. I could almost feel the arousal building between my hips. I just tapped CagedMonkey on the hip and told him I couldn’t take it anymore and I had to make him mine. I made him get on his back at the edge of the bed, legs wrapped around my hips. I lubed up the probe and took my time, gently working his tight opening, pressing slowly, loosing him up to take me. The height was so perfect with him laying on the bed that way. My knees pushed against the side of the bed and my hips moving back and forth sliding deeper with each thrust.
2015-03-15 07.40.29I was so careful and sweet to him, making love to him as I pushed and pulled on the harness with my hips back and forth motion. The harness made it so easy to control it and, for the first time, it actually felt like I was having sex with him like I was the guy and he was the girl. Laying on his back, legs up, looking me in the eye as I slid deeper into him. As I thrust into him, I reached up and grabbed his caged cock, gave it a tug and told him I bet he wished I was stroking his cock while I was making love to him so tenderly. I slid my hand up his stomach and played with his nipples as I continued giving him all 6″ of my strap-on.

I was getting extremely turned on and I could feel my pussy getting wetter and wetter. I began thrusting a little faster and I felt the probe tugging as I began to thrust harder. That’s when I added more lube and that made it slide in and out so much smoother. I continued penetrating him deeper, faster, harder. I felt my aggression growing as I started to speed up and get more rough with him. I grabbed his thighs at his hips and started yanking him toward me onto the strap-on. Harder and faster I began fucking him and I felt myself switch over from the wife who was lovingly pegging her husband to the aggressive hungry animal inside me fucking the hole in front of me.

I could feel my leverage was off for a good hard fucking so I pulled out quickly, oh the sounds he made when I did! I ordered him to turn his slutty ass over because I was about to fuck him like my dirty little whore. He stood up, turned toward the bed and I just shoved him face down on to it. I pushed my knees against the back of his thighs to steady myself, got more lube just to make sure I didn’t have to stop and I slid into him quickly, penetrating him deep. He let out such a throaty sounding moan. Oh God the sounds he makes just drive me!
2015-03-15 07.38.01If felt so good and powerful to pound his ass that way, calling him my little slut. Asking him to tell me how my dirty little slut loves when I fuck him in the ass. I made him tell me how he loves when I use him for my pleasure. I also had him tell me he was MY slut to be used however I wanted, my hole to fuck. As I heard him these things fall from his lips, I felt such heat in my crotch. I felt the inside of my pussy twitch and my lips began to ache. I couldn’t believe it but I was about to cum, really hard, from pegging him. I grabbed his left hip with my left hand and slid my right up over his shoulder as I shoved in as hard and deep as I could and I just told him I was about to cum while I was fucking his ass. I told him he was my slut who wanted me to cum while I was fucking him so he could clean up all my delicious juices after I fucked him. I was so turned on I knew this wasn’t going to be just any cum, it was going to be a good cum and that’s exactly what it was. It was a long hard very wet cum.

Once I was able to catch my breath and come back down from my orgasm, I pulled out and told him to get his face in my pussy right then and start cleaning up the mess. He licked from bottom to top, slurping up all of my gooey warm cum. Once he had sufficiently cleaned up my sloppy wetness I told him it was time to clean the toys. I snuggled in bed waiting for him and we lay there cuddling and talking and getting in some very loving aftercare.

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I know March is supposedly “Ask a Question” month here in the blogosphere but I really didn’t make a big deal about it because we don’t usually get into all those little traditions. However, I DO love questions so maybe this is one I should have gotten into!! Oh well… with all that said, we had a fellow blogger comment the other day to ask a question and I decided with the subject matter that the answer might be better explained in it’s own post. What he is asking is something that I have often thought to write about and explain my view on but I haven’t just yet, now seems like the perfect time. I do encourage any other Dominant ladies, Mistresses, whatever who might read our blog to give an answer as well, feel free to comment!

Here is the comment from DtBHC:

As March is not yet over I thought I would ask a few more questions. I have posed the same questions to other dominant women to gauge their thoughts on this matter as well.

The topic I would like to get an understanding of from you is around the feminisation of your partner. Obviously this can be a fantasy of the male in the relationship and therefore something they desire, but what I was interested in was what do you gain from any such practices that you adopt in your relationship? N on occasions likes to make up my face. This occurred a few times before we started this current dynamic and only once since. It was different when she did it the last time as I was more accepting of what she was doing and hence she enjoyed it more. I still don’t know what she gets out of it.

This is what he is curious to know:

So the sorts of practices I have seen mentioned are like breast growth, wearing panties, being plugged or pegged (fantasy of mine so I get the thrill this brings your partner), removing hair and wearing adornments. So if you wouldn’t mind, could you please share with me what these practices mean to you and the relationship?

As far as the whole feminization (I’ll spell it the American way haha) thing goes, it seems that is something that most people think HAS to be part of a D/s relationship. Personally, I do not think anything HAS to be part of any relationship. I think you do what you enjoy, no matter what it is or whether it makes sense to you or any one else!

Now, as far as feminization in OUR relationship, it is actually something we are not into. We did for a VERY short time play with the whole wear my panties thing but, to be honest, it’s not a turn on and I might even consider it a turn off to see MY husband being feminized. If we are to discuss what I do with some of my other subs, then there are other dynamics at play. I like to get to know my subby boys which means I get to know if they have a thing about humiliation and of course then I can feminize them. If it is something they enjoy and get a thrill from then I am going to go all out doing what I am able to give them what they need. I do know that some women enjoy some parts of feminization, whether thats a completely shaved, smooth body or how pretty her guy looks in panties, it’s just not something I enjoy. This is the same for the breast growth or looking in any way feminine. I like to see my man as a big man. A man that, even though he’s a big strong man, I control and have on my puppet strings.

What this practice ultimately comes down to is control. A man wants to be controlled to the extent that he could even be made to be completely the opposite of what he is. There is a huge aspect of humiliation when a man being treated as a woman or seen as a panty wearing sissy boy. It digs deep into them showing them they are not even worthy of being men. I guess there might even be a little bit of degradation in there as well. Along with this some might go as far as the Forced Bi thing and that’s just another aspect of control.

DtBHC also asked about buttplugs and pegging and I guess in a way the pegging could be seen as sexual feminization – a man being fucked as a woman would be. I’ll spend a little time getting into how I view buttplugs and then pegging.

The use of buttplugs for me is not something I would consider a form of feminization. For me this is another aspect of control. I do not use buttplugs to cause pain, punish or stretch my boys. I use them to control yet another part of their body and to cause frustration because they sit on their already swollen prostate.

Pegging, on the other hand, I don’t know that I would call it feminine, many people have anal sex and is it feminizing for two men when they are having sex? I don’t think so. I think it’s just another way to have sex and not necessarily feminizing. I can see it being used that way, to humiliate and degrade and man by dressing him up as a slutty girl in a pink frilly shirt and a mini skirt, bending him over the side of the bed and fucking him in the ass like the dirty little slut he is… but I don’t feel it HAS to be that way.  I do think having a man that way, who is not normally in that position, and taking him in that way can be just another way to enjoy sex and control… it just so happens a woman doesn’t usually have an actual penis to use on her man so there is a need for a strap-on.

So I apologize to DtBHC, if my answers are a bit vague or maybe not be the full fetish answers he wanted to hear. I play with and do the things that make me feel good and that I enjoy. I also do them for the reasons and, in the way that I enjoy. I dont think there is some rule book that has to be followed and that you have to be one certain way because you do a certain thing.

Thank you for the questions and I certainly encourage more! I do love to get questions (even if it takes me days to answer them!)

This technique (or something very similar) is something that was made up by a gentleman who was looking for an interesting way to inflict or enjoy pain. He chose to share this idea with me thinking I would enjoy using it on my subs. So here is my version of his “One Clip Method.” Thank you to Oralslave4Tng (aka Larry) for sharing this interesting take on some pain play. Please keep an eye out in the comments for reviews of your technique!

One Clip Method

SUPPLIES NEEDED:

Straight Back Chair
Hood or Blindfold
Rope/Restraints
Clothes Pins or Nipple Clamps
Timer/Stopwatch

This session is designed to last 60 minutes. You can use any type of clothes pin or nipple clamps you have available, the kind with little ridges are obviously going to be more painful but after 60 minutes of this any type of clamp is going to be pushing the pain receptors.
Please read all of these instructions carefully before you begin.

INSTRUCTIONS:

– Place a hood or blindfold over the eyes because your submissive will experience this with no vision

– Gag his mouth, there is no need to have him yelping

– Have him sit in a straight back chair and bind him to it securely. Bind arms bound behind the chair and tightly to the chair, and his legs bound tightly to the legs of the chair. Make sure his chest and hips are also bound to the chair if you choose

– Take the clothes pin or nipple clamp and place it on one of his nipples and keep it there for 90 seconds

– Remove it and switch it to the other nipple. Keep it on the second nipple again for 90 seconds

– Switch it back to the first nipple, only this time turn it 45 degree to the right or left

Keep repeating this process every 90 seconds for the full 60 minutes. This will allow the clothes pin to be applied and removed 20 times to each nipple

This will quickly become a torture that your submissive will learn to love or hate as the case may be for him. I assure You that YOU will greatly love watching him suffer this torture, knowing that he is totally at YOUR mercy and that YOU will be showing him no such mercy!

Enjoy and have fun and I expect a full report in my comments as to how this experience was for you! 🙂

Yesterday I started to feel a bit depressed and I couldn’t exactly put a finger on the specific thing that was making me feel down. I do know that it hit me quick and hit me kinda hard. One of the crappy things about being so in tune with my mental state (I’ve got way too many years of therapy to thank for that) is that I FEEL my depression kick in almost immediately. I feel my body change and my thoughts change. Yes, it’s an AWESOME thing that I can now do that because I can get right on top of it and work out the problem before I spiral out of control down into a deep hole. So, I knew something was wrong after cagedmonkey came home and asked “do you think I could get out and maybe sleep more comfortably?” For some reason that really got to me.

When I got up yesterday morning and was texting with CM on his way home from work, I was excited about maybe putting him in the bondage sack and depriving him good sleep and just tormenting him all day. It was exciting to think about all the things I wanted to do to tease him and drive him crazy. After all, I had spent the night before sending him pics and video of me getting off with my wand. It really seemed to drive him nuts.
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After he got home and asked me to get out in such a non-urgent way it just gave me this feeling that he wasn’t even horny. I felt like he wasn’t aching to get out and that all the teasing and stuff I’d been doing wasn’t frustrating him at all. I LOVE to see his frustration, to hear him beg, to know that what I’m doing is making him bonkers. I mentioned to him that I thought he should unlock and masturbate because he didnt seem all that submissive to me. I felt like maybe he was just bored and done playing my game. This apparently confused him because in his mind he was feeling very submissive – I just wasnt seeing it outwardly. This is where the wonderful communication in a relationship comes in.

Our conversation was through text messages because of the kids, it went like this:

CM: I’m sorry you feel as though my desire to be dominated is gone…. I don’t know what is causing these thoughts, but it’s not true…. I love being controlled by you, being kept by you, being yours and only yours all day every day…. Is it possible that you are questioning your own level of passion for this? Could it be that you are projecting – instead of me not being as submissive as you like, in fact you are not being as dominant as you want to be? Not trying to blame you, I promise, just trying to figure out what the deal is.

LM: I don’t feel like I have any loss of passion… At the moment I don’t feel submission and maybe it is my fault maybe I’m not being dominant enough, maybe I’m not intense enough… I’m just feeling inadequate.

CM: I don’t feel that’s true. I’m enjoying everything about us.
Would you like me to stop “asking out”? Is that me taking too much power from you?

LM: I don’t know what I want… I want to feel like you NEED desperately to be out and that’s why your asking and not feel like it’s a “hey yeah, I was thinking I could sleep comfortably” thing… Maybe what I need is to keep you locked up a little extended and tease you to tears. Maybe it was just that whole situation made it feel weird… Maybe I need to hear some me and you fantasies too. Not stockade, fucking machine, girlie play partner, abandonment fantasies but you and me fantasies from you. To feel like there is still this dynamic in your mind between us and that all that other stuff isn’t necessary. I dunno, I guess sometimes I feel like I’m competing with the bigger fantasies and maybe I won’t live up to those.

CM: I don’t “fantasize” about us too much because it’s already real and I love it! Maybe I’ve gotten too much into the “don’t expect anything” mentality, but I haven’t shared too much only because I don’t want to push you or affect you, etc… I was really hoping you’d follow through with your “sleep sack” idea today. It’s been a while since you’ve done any full bondage/teasing type stuff…. I didn’t want to push too hard and mention it/ask for it because that’s not what I do anymore. We’ve had a lot of “starter” moments lately – like the other day when you were stimulating pegging me on the bed, etc – but not a lot of times where we’ve actually played together. I figured you were getting back into it on your own pace, so I didn’t want to pressure you.

LM: I guess I at least want to know that you think about and desire things between us… it’s not about asking because I like that you don’t ask or push me or annoy me to do things… but telling me “oh I was thinking, last night, about that time when you tied me to the bed….” or “I dreamed about us laying together and I realized you had tied me down and you were masturbating next to me and I couldn’t move to help or touch you or even look at you” etc. Knowing that you think about me sexually, that you remember those times makes me want to recreate them or do something similar… it let’s me know that I did something good and you liked it and you want it again. It’s not you asking when you are reminiscing – even if you wrote about it on the blog – how “that one time” felt, how you loved it, what you loved, that you’d love it again… stuff like that. Being “caught up” in something we did – not obsessing but the “wow, ugh, awesomeness, frustration” and reminiscing – that’s a good word to describe it… not getting stuck in a moment or on something we did but being caught up in it just enough to show me “fuck that was awesome can we do it again?”

CM: I will try harder to find that “middle ground.”

LM: Btw we’ve had those moments but then the playtime is lost and, today… I just felt blah after this morning and my oomph for the sleep sack drifted quickly and I had this why bother feeling… like it wouldn’t matter if I did because I’m not good enough anyway.

CM: I’m sorry I haven’t been giving you what you need.

LM: I don’t think it’s that YOU haven’t been giving me what I need… I just think I’m figuring it out, right now, talking to you… that sometimes (obviously not all the time!) I need to know what I’m doing is good and appreciated and wanted and desired. Maybe I’m completely wrong and I just suck.

CM: You don’t suck, I wish you sucked more, tbh 😉
On my penis
My achy needy penis

Ok, ok you can see where that conversation led after that. Having that conversation actually catapulted us into an extremely frustratingly horny day. I was sopping wet all day while we were sexting and sneaking playful moments here and there when the kids were busy. It was wonderful to talk about all the naughty, playful, kinky things we do again. I’ve missed hearing how tight his cage feels or how what I’m doing is effecting him. I think we got to a point where it just felt so normal to horny all the time and he must have figured I knew he was horny, so why tell me. Well… telling me fuels me, keeps me going and makes me eager to push the intensity level. I really am just figuring this out and I’m so happy that my marriage is in a different place now. Two years ago, we’d never mention sex, let alone have a conversation about anything that was bothering one of us. We would hold on to it and let it build resentment – it was how we coped with the fear. This is SO much better and I love being in this place with my husband. I love him and where we are emotionally, spiritually and sexually.

It’s crazy that I just thought about the fact that cagedmonkey has been denied over a month! It hardly feels like it! I remember not too long ago I was dying to have him orgasm myself by now but this time, a month feels like nothing. It’s interesting how things change in a year and a half. It seems like this whole 6 months of denial might not be as hard as I thought. Who knows… maybe at 6 months I’ll be like, eh that wasn’t so hard, lets go another month and another! Who knows how long we can go without him orgasming! 🙂

Today has been so much fun. I’ve been teasing cagedmonkey throughout the day. At one point I texted him, told him to go in the bedroom and stroke his cock nice and hard. I didn’t tell him for how long or anything and off he went. I soon followed and stood there, hands in my pockets, watching him stroke himself. Then I pushed him back on the bed, bent his knees and put his legs up. Our bed just happens to be the perfect height for a pegging so I simulated that while I stroke his cock. I loved hearing him moan while I was fake fucking him.

I continued my hip thrusts against him while I was stroking his cock, I rubbed my hand up his stomach to his nipple and as I pinched it I said, “I bet you’d love it if I was fucking you right now and made you cum all over your stomach.” He just moaned out an, “oh yes!” It was really very pleasing to tease him and intensify his horny that much more.

I can’t wait till later. The kids will be going to bed soon and we plan to have a couple drinks and then it’s playtime! There will be no falling asleep early tonight!

Last night was the first of our two nights together and it was such a lovely night too. No, we didn’t get all naughty kinky crazy sexual, we just enjoyed watching tv and being close. Cagedmonkey was locked right up until we went to bed. I actually wasn’t going to unlock him because I wanted to build his frustration. Then just as he was getting in bed I told him to take off his cage, just in case. 🙂

Since we only get two precious nights together naked in bed, I cherish those times. Last night, as we lay there completely naked, our warm skin pressing together, I thought about how horny I was for him. I thought about making love to him, about feeling him in that amazing way. Then I thought about how incredibly frustrating it must be to finally be unlocked and laying naked together. How bad he must have wanted to be in my warm pussy. I love to increase his horniness, to tease him and make him want me desperately.

I can just imagine how bad he was aching to be with me as we lay there, his cock hard against the soft skin of my ass. Not to mention those times I woke in the middle of the night to run my hands on his body. Those times I trailed my fingers over his skin, around his sexy hips to tickle, tease and fondle his cock.

Not sure how many times I can say it but I really, really, really do love being a cocktease.

I really do love that we can go from intense fantasy-like sexual times to very sensual loving more vanilla-like times. I love that I can be with and enjoy my husband this way. It wasn’t always like this. There was a time when I was anxious about any amount of affection because the motive behind it was always sex, sex, sex. It’s just not that way with us when I’m in control. We have much more sex than we ever have and much more intense sex. It really is an amazing thing.

Tonight… I can’t say, is going to be as sensual or as vanilla because I’ve only been up for 2 hours and my pussy is aching in my panties right now. I’m aching to feel him, to be with him, to cum good and hard on him.

Wow, did I ever end up horny the other night. Cagedmonkey and I were making out on the couch and I even had an orgasm rubbing myself on his lap. It all just got me going so much that I just needed to feel him. I pulled him on top of me and made him simulate making love with me. God, just being with him in that position, in that way, makes me bonkers. At that moment, period or not I told him I needed him. I needed him to get that cage off and to make love to me. I needed to feel his thickness inside of me. I needed to feel my pussy clamp down on him as I cum on his cock.

He was so hard in his cage, pressing hard against the bars, squeezing out. He told me he had no idea how he was getting out and I told him I didn’t care, I wanted him out and I wanted him out right then. He was just going to have to yank it off. He managed to pop the cage off and the dents in his shaft were outstanding. They looked similar to this:

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He even managed to bend himself out of the ring too. And I just grabbed ahold of him and guided his cock into my pussy, I barely waited for him to kneel down between my legs. I really did just need to feel him and cum on him. It wasn’t even so much about feeling him thrust as it was him filling me up so my muscles could grip and squeeze his shaft as I came. It’s just such a wonderful feeling to feel myself clench around him.

I had several super hard amazing orgasms. My whole body tightening, shaking and quivering with each one. Sometimes I really wish I was able to be as loud as I need to be, to scream out “oh myfucking God” while cumming. I just can’t with kids down the hall sleeping in their bedrooms. Even though I couldn’t be as loud as I want I still cum so fucking hard. So hard, in fact, that when I stood up the other night I almost fell over and passed out. My brain was ridiculously fried. I think I had cum so hard and held my breath so long from holding in the screams that I lost some oxygen to my brain. I felt very dizzy, woozy and lost my balance and almost fell. Luckily cagedmonkey was there to give a hand but, wow, was it crazy to feel so out of control of myself after cumming like that. Especially when hubby is denied and all my hard cumming does is frustrate him more and more everyday. Making me cum is one of the biggest teases for him. He is giving me the one thing he is so desperate to have. To me, there really is nothing better than my hair trigger horny man.

Haha ok yeah yeah, I kinda teased you a bit with that title. You probably thought I was going to talk all about how to go about meeting yourself a mistress… well not in this post, but maybe another time! Really, WE are the ones meeting a mistress… a specific, wonderful, delicious, yummy, gorgeous mistress and her slave!

Last year, Mistress Marie and I started chatting and found out we lived rather close to one another – especially when it comes to the big ol’ world wide web. We have also learned in that time that we have loads in common and that we get along particularly well. So she and I talked about the four of us meeting in person. I’m so excited to say that time is here! I’m super duper mega (as I said on their blog) excited to be meeting Mistress Marie and her Slave David!

In a couple of weeks, they will be traveling here for the night. They’ve booked the executive suite at a local hotel and we will be enjoying a meal, wonderful friendship and who knows what else. I do know that this room they’ve booked has this huge “board room” style table in it… to eat on, of course… or maybe tie the boys to… or maybe bend them over it… or… maybe just to eat on! 🙂 haha hey, we’re all bringing some toys just in case.

Whatever happens, vanilla or otherwise, I feel we are blessed to have made such wonderful friends that we can get together with and enjoy time with. I love that there are no expectations and what happens will happen. I do know we plan to have wine (we even live the same wine!)… that could just be the catalyst needed to create a very kinky situation. 🙂 Though, I’m happy with us sitting and talking openly and freely about every aspect of our lives and not having to hide any part of who we are! 🙂 oh, and, I really really really can’t wait to hug Marie (and I might sneak in a boobie squeeze cause… well, I like boobies!)!

Looking forward to this and hopefully many more get together with them!

You know, I always say how I really can’t stand punishments and discipline. I say how I’d rather just have someone fucking behave themselves and do as they say they are going to do. It just makes things that much easier.

Anyway… It’s been a few days now that cagedmonkey has had to deal with my punishment from his falling asleep on me the other day. It’s also been a few days that *I’ve* had to deal with it. Quite frankly, in bored to bits with this shit already. I really truly need to come up with much more acute, direct, strong corrections that do not last more than a day. I’m so bored with having to decide which plug to stuff his ass with or having to stuff whatever I want in him to punish him. It’s just really no fun anymore. It was sure fun to think about when coming up with the idea but it has quickly lost its power.

So, this might be some big “no, no” in the D/s world but fuck that, I’m in charge and if I say I’m done with a punishment (or part of it as it is) then so be it. Am I being soft? No, I don’t think so, because it’s not like he’s whining and begging me to not punish him anymore. It’s my choice to do this. So I’ve decided that I’m letting go of the whole butt plug and ass violating thing. He will, however, continue to be in his cage for as long as I want without a break and continue wearing his collar every night.

I really am going to have to come up with some fantastic, though short, corrections instead of these long intense ones… that ultimately become too fucking long, boring and annoying to me.

With that said… I’m off to shop for a new paddle, any suggestions?

I thought I’d post a couple pictures here on the blog this morning since, if you don’t follow us on Twitter, you don’t really get to see the “Good morning” pictures I send out.

I had a little fun this morning teasing cagedmonkey and making him take these pictures. I thought you all might appreciate them, especially those Male Dom & Switchy types out there! Enjoy!

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Fun with nipple clamps – boy they pinch and wearing them only reminds me I am NOT into pain!

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Now I’m off to smother cagedmonkey with these big beauties as a fun way to interrupt his sleep! I hope you all have a wonderful day! 🙂