frustration

All posts tagged frustration

Conversations in Chastity: Early Parole?

Posted by cagedmonkey on March 1, 2014
Posted in: Conversations, Female Led Relationship, Male Chastity, Orgasm Denial. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . 3 comments

cagedmonkey: I’m being hit pretty hard by the “I want to be out” and “I just need to feel your pussy around my cock” feelings lately. Apparrently, the ways you’ve been teasing me over the past week have been damn effective.

Lady:Awww, I get those feelings too, wanting you inside me. I just know the longer you stay locked in your cage the better it’s going to be on my birthday. I’m loving the effect this is having on you.

cm: Yeah, that… I don’t know why I’m having such a rough time this time around. I was perfectly fine starting out after Valentine’s Day, but ever since our adventures in alcohol I’ve been on edge. It could be the two weeks of denial I’ve built up, but it’s not even cumming that I’m obessing over. It’s feeling your pussy around my hard cock. I’m needing it bad!

Lady: Awww aren’t you cute, wanting to feel my tight pussy squeeze your big hard cock. You know, there’s always a chance I could let you feel my pussy. Realistically, you will be out of your cage at least a couple times. We’ll see if I can resist. 🙂

cm: Well, technically I have felt your pussy on my cock… the few times you’ve let me in your pussy with the cage on! It seems to me, though, that we are back on track for having me locked up until your birthday pretty much 24/7 (except for maintenance issues, cage switching, etc.). Am I right about that?

Lady: Yes, you are right about that. 🙂 I’m sure there will be a couple of times you’ll be out by then for a good cage cleaning and a good shave. Though the shaving thing with the cage on I’ve got down. And I am really loving what it does to you when I get that cage inside me and especially if I cum around it. It must be super frustrating to barely feel me like that.

cm: It really is. Being that close to something I want where I can feel it, but I can’t have what I want is KILLING ME! My balls are feeling full and swollen, my cock aches nearly constantly, and I can’t help but get turned on when I simply look at you! The chastity effects are coming down full force on me this time around, and it’s your teasing and control that is causing it.

 
Lady: I really am loving how horny you are this time. I love your reactions. I’m getting so turned on myself because you are reacting so strongly to my teasing. You’re much more sexually charged and “hair trigger” and those reactions are boosting my self esteem and make me actually feel it when you say I’m sexy, beautiful or amazing. Can you see why I want to keep you locked up and on this path? I don’t want to lose how good it feels with you in this mega horny state. That’s why I want to keep you locked so long this time, to see just how “hair trigger” you can get. I know you want to be my good boy and wait for that, right? 😉

cm: Honestly? YES!!! It’s starting to become difficult to maintain my sanity, but that’s okay. I know that you are worth the wait and that you will make it worth the wait when it is over. And you are definitely worth submitting to. I wouldn’t have it any other way!

Lady: Awww look how sweet my boy is… you are a smart boy and you’re right, it’s all going to be worth it. Feeling my tight pussy wrapped around your cock in April is going to be amazing!

I’m glad your so obsessed with feeling my pussy because, if you remember, that’s all you get then. Your next chance to cum isn’t until June. 🙂

Boy, oh, boy is this ever going to be fun! 🙂

The Conflicting Feelings of a Chaste Hubby

Posted by cagedmonkey on February 7, 2014
Posted in: Anal, Bondage, Sex, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 7 comments

My Lady and I were texting each other last night while I was at work, and the conversation wandered to the topic of sensory deprivation. You see, ML has been doing some research in that area, specifically sensory deprivation hoods. And when ML starts doing research, you know that she’s getting serious about it.

She began to text me some of the ideas that have been popping up in her head, and I couldn’t help but get turned on (which made my cock strain against the cage rather strongly). Here are just a few examples of the texts she sent me:

  • “like putting your hands in mittens behind your back, making you kneel on the floor hooded”
  • “I could open only the gag and make you choke on my dildo”
  • “I could take off the blindfold with my pussy right in your face while I cum”
  • “Put a dildo in your ass and make you sit on it while I fuck your mouth with mine”
  • “So if I told you I could put the hood on and use the face dildo as the gag piece instead and fuck your sensory deprived face, how would that make you feel?”

How would it make me feel?

Those sound like horrible, terrible things to have to endure. I don’t know if I could take it.

How would it make me feel?

I need to experience this.

That’s how it makes me feel. I can imagine myself in the moment, wanting it to end so badly, wondering why and how I got myself into this, suffering in pain and frustration. Yet it’s undeniable – I want it to happen. When I read those texts – and even now as I retype them – I get a tightness in my chest that says to me, “Oh. My. God. I NEED THIS.”

It’s scary and confusing to have these types of feelings – to want something you don’t want to happen happen, so badly. But honestly, that’s pretty much what chastity is. I’m sitting here with my cock locked in a steel cage with no way to get out on my own, and I desperately want to cum. But I want to be like this – desperate for release, yet powerless to facilitate that release, completely dependent on My Lady for any and all sources of sexual pleasure. I trust My Lady with my life; I know she will protect me and keep me safe, even when she is putting me through hell just because she can and she wants to. It speaks to my devotion to her how badly I want this to happen, even though I don’t want this to happen.

Now I’m left wondering just when she plans on putting these things in motion…

Taking a Chance

Posted by cagedmonkey on January 17, 2014
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 3 comments

roulette_lg

To celebrate our anniversary this weekend, My Lady and I are taking a trip to a local casino for some gambling & drinking fun. She even set us up with a babysitter for the day so we can go and enjoy ourselves without the kids in tow. What a wonderful anniversary gift for BOTH of us!

Until, of course, I open my big mouth.

You see, part of our agreement is that I tell ML about any and all fantasies or ideas that I get that involve our sex life. ML has been struggling with the decision on whether or not to let me cum on our anniversary – she REALLY wants me to fill her up with a nice hot load of cum, but she also REALLY wants to push me further. She couldn’t decide. That’s when my kinky, creative brain kicked in and came up with an idea that she seems to like a helluva lot more than I probably will.

Here’s my idea – we are going to find the roulette table in the casino and choose one spin to dictate a number. That number will determine how many extra days will be added to my current stint of orgasm denial. Thanks to the zero and double zero spaces, I actually have a 1/19 (~5%) chance to cum that night. However, I also risk the possibility of having to go another thirty six days without an orgasm. Considering I am already approaching three weeks without an orgasm, the longest time since we’ve started our chastity lifestyle without cumming, adding another month-plus on the back end is going to be torture. I know what I’m rooting for. What My Lady is hoping for is a mystery to me…

Wish me luck!

Conversations in Chastity – Developing Situations

Posted by Lady M on December 21, 2013
Posted in: Conversations, KeyHolder, Male Chastity. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . 2 comments

(Lady and cagedmonkey feel that communication is the key to a healthy relationship, and especially important in a chastity relationship. Occasionally, Lady and cagedmonkey will shed some light on what these conversations are like. What follows is a discussion between the two of them, all while posting to the blog.)

CM: So I wanted to ask you something…

Lady: ok?
 
CM: Does your intense arousal level push you farther in denying me, or does denying me increase your arousal level? Or is it chicken and egg?
 
Lady: Oh boy… uhhh… honestly I don’t know!
 
CM: Because I definitely see it feed both ways…. When you see how desperate I am, your pussy soaks, and other times you get so turned on, you really take teasing me to another level.
 
Lady: Oh definitely! I get extremely turned on by your desperation… but making you get to the point of desperation is extremely arousing

CM: But when you get turned on, you want to push me more.
 
Lady: Sitting here… I might have to say the bigger more arousing thing is seeing and feeling your ache, your desperate need for me. It’s like the one is the initial turn on but the big big thing is you being there and it makes me want to push you more so I feel more – maybe

CM: Another question – When we first started, you said that no matter how much I pleased you while locked, you would still need my cock. Is that starting to change? 
 
Lady: Definitely not.

 
CM: Ok good 🙂
 
Lady: I still need and want you very very badly… the part that changed is my will power and that I see how you get the longer I deny you so I want to make myself hold off but it’s very difficult

CM: But I sense the need to make me cum has subsided quite a bit.

Lady: THAT has totally changed! I used to feel like I had to give you an orgasm to keep you happy and wanting to be with me… now… I don’t feel that way at all.
 
CM: Do you still want/need my help?
 
Lady: Your help to deny you? I don’t think so… I don’t need you to not ask for fear that I might give in. If I “give in” it’s because I want to not because of what you do or don’t do

CM: What about you though? The feel of my cock surging inside you, filling you up…. You said before that you need that. Not anymore?

Lady: I DO need it… I just know if I force myself to wait it will be that much more fantastic

CM: So it’s more like you want it, but you can wait for it
 
Lady: Oh hell I want it, need it, ache for it but I’m able to control it – with the help of the device. If the device wasn’t there I’d give in and fuck you all the time

CM: I wish! Do you think you’ll ever be able to progress from “want” to “need”? I just realized this sounds like pressuring but it’s not, just curious
 
Lady: I don’t feel this as pressuring at all, dear

CM: Ok good 🙂
 
Lady: What do you mean progress from want to need?
 
CM: Basically, i’m wondering if we will get to the stage where you can keep me cum-less indefinitely without “denying” yourself….. I don’t mean permanent (God no), but for as long as you like with no limits
 
Lady: You mean without feeling like I’m denying myself?
 
CM: Yes.
 
Lady: I think my levels will/are changing as to when I start to NEED to feel you, see you or want you to cum.
 
CM: Ok. For your information, I’m hoping we can get there. I want you to have everything you want but still be able to deny me for as long as you wish (weeks, months, etc)

Lady: That’s the overall plan 🙂
 
CM: I don’t want anything to influence you, including your cravings.
 
Lady: I’m slowly building my “tolerance” or ability to hold off on feeling you… it’s not easy because looking back, 10 days kicks my ass (right about now!) but I’m getting better at getting through by not unlocking you on vulnerable days!
 
CM: But what happens if a non vulnerable day turns into a vulnerable day? 🙂
 
Lady: Well… I guess we’ll have to cross that bridge when we get there 🙂

 
CM: I’m just afraid one day I’ll be inside  you and you’ll cave in the middle of a MASSIVE denial period 🙂
 
Lady: If that happened, we start over… we have so many years ahead! 🙂
 
CM: True…  I just  wanna wanna wanna wanna  do  this right!
 
Lady: There is no right or wrong, darling How we do it IS right!

CM: Got that right!

Conversations in Chastity: Getting Serious

Posted by cagedmonkey on December 3, 2013
Posted in: Conversations, Female Led Relationship, Male Chastity, Marriage, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 2 comments

cagedmonkey: We’ve found out so much about this lifestyle in such a short time. It really is amazing!!

Lady: It’s been a whirlwind that’s for sure… but I’ve realized some things since our last go at your orgasm denial.

cm: What things, exactly?

Lady: Well, after this last time having you completely locked and even denying myself I kinda feel like I’ve tested out all that I need in this. I really just want to get on with it. I don’t want to set dates of when you will be locked or unlocked trying to reach some imaginary goal. I’m not going to worry about “oh I shouldn’t unlock him because I said 10 days in!” I’m going to do what I want, when I want, how I want but you will not orgasm… you will please me and I will use you to please myself but you will wait until you have permission to cum. I will see my cock hard & play with it when I want though. All other times you will be locked in your device.

cm: I was actually thinking the exact same thing! We’ve proven that I can safely wear the cage pretty much indefinitely without problems – indefinitely meaning however long you want, not forever (I hope!!!). We have also seen that I’m able to be trusted not to cum when I’m out of the cage, even when giving you the penetration that you crave. The only thing that I’m concerned about is the strength of your resolve. Will you be able to deny me even when I’m seriously trying my hardest to convince you to let me cum?

Lady: I’m pretty sure the denial part will be a piece of cake! The hardest part for me was feeling like I had to keep you locked up to enforce the denial. That’s not true so it should be easy enough, when I’m getting what I need and want, to keep you all crazy. You know I absolutely love when you’ve been reduced to a heaping, begging, desperate mess! Oh boy, it turns me on so much! Are you here with me in my desire to take more control over how I want to use the cage? This starting out thing has been not only about me but lots of worrying about you and what you feel or think and some caving to what I think you want. I’m ready for that to be over.

cm: I’m ready, too. I want it all to be you decision. If you want to tease me until I’m crying out for you to stop every night for a week, then so be it. If you want to keep me locked up constantly for three or even four weeks straight (or more!!!), then please do it. There will be times where I want it to end, where I just want out, or I just want to FUCKING CUM GOD DAMMIT. But what I truly want is to cum only when I’m allowed by you, my Keyholder.

Lady: Awww now that’s the perfect answer from my perfect boy! <3

I Have the Best Keyholder in the World!

Posted by cagedmonkey on November 30, 2013
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Marriage, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . 2 comments

Sorry to all you other guys, but it’s true. My wife is the absolute BEST keyholder in the world.

For me, at least.  🙂

It takes a certain kind of relationship to make this chastity thing work. My wife and I have been through a lot, but nothing would have been able to prepare us for this if we didn’t fully trust each other. When we are fully open and honest with each other, we often find that we are not only on the same page or even paragraph – we are on the same freaking word!

I think back to when we were writing out our chastity agreement. Even though I was giving My Lady complete control over sexual abilities (including the ability to orgasm or even simply getting a hardon), I knew there were some neighborhoods and areas I’d rather not explore. I was struggling with how to explain this oxymoron of a situation – “I want you to do whatever you want, but not if what you want is one of these things” – I was kind of worried it wouldn’t come out right. What a pleasant surprise it was when I found out that ML was not interested in those same things! Writing up our agreement went so much easier than I expected, and we were both more than happy to sign it.

My keyholder knows just how to play me. She knows where all of my buttons are and she presses them often. She knows that a subtle change in posture can flip the switch in my brain and instantly have me wanting to kiss and lick her body all over. And when my brain is stuck on sex, she knows how to push me and push me until my chest is tight and I can’t breathe. And when she gets me alone…. well, from her previous post, it’s obvious she can turn me into a quivering, whimpering puddle of frustration and need pretty much any time she wants.

And that’s what I need. I need a keyholder who will use me for her pleasure and amusement. A keyholder who won’t take my requests or pleads into account when deciding what she does. A keyholder who expects me to worship her mind and body every moment of every day.

Nobody else could do this for me but My Lady.

Conversations in Chastity: Frustration

Posted by cagedmonkey on November 27, 2013
Posted in: Conversations, Male Chastity. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . 3 comments

(Lady and cagedmonkey feel that communication is the key to a healthy relationship, and especially important in a chastity relationship. Occasionally, Lady and cagedmonkey will shed some light on what these conversations are like. What follows is a discussion between the two of them, all while posting to the blog.)

cagedmonkey: So today marks a week for me in the cage, 24/7 straight except for a small release time due to switching devices. This is usually about the time when I start feeling the need to cum grow stronger, and the feelings of frustration really start to take hold. I’m curious: is this change obvious from where you are standing, or is it a gradual slide as the days go on?

Lady: It’s really obvious when you are physically showing your frustration and your horniness. It does seem to occur day to day and sometimes can be triggered by how much physical attention (teasing) I’m offering. When you are only using your words to express it I don’t feel your level of need, other times you are basically “jumping my bones” and then it’s very obvious. LoL

cm: The only reason I haven’t been “jumping your bones” in the last few days is because we haven’t been in the same room alone for very much time. If I had more chances to do so, I would be definitely taking advantage of them! Believe it or not, pleasing you and serving you relieves some of the frustration for a short while. But the feelings come right back when you turn the focus back to driving me nutty.

Lady: So you’re saying times like this morning when I come upstairs, wake you up and end up teasing you help your frustration level? 😉

cm: I don’t know if I’d use the word “help.” 🙂 But yes, it drives me nuts! I want to be inside you, feel you without the cage around me. It feels so good, and I know it’s so far away. You don’t even know how frustrating it is at times.

Lady: No, you’re right, I can’t imagine how frustrating it is but I certainly can imagine many ways to make the frustration worse.

cm: You’ve definitely shown that you are capable of increasing my frustration. When you let me inside your wet pussy but only in the cage, it is very difficult for me to be so close to what I want but still not getting what I need.

Lady: It’s very easy for me to create frustration for you but that doesn’t mean I’M not frustrated too! It’s not the same frustration but it’s hard just the same. Like it’s easy wanting so bad to feel you? Easy to want to feel that cock sliding in and out of my pussy and cumming deep inside me? Easy to want to feeling the warmth of your skin touching mine and the heat we create between my legs when we make love… that doesn’t frustrate me?

cm: Omg……….. what were we talking about? Oh yes, FRUSTRATION!!! I understand that you can get frustrated at times, too. But look at the situation: you can unlock me at any time you want and get the things that you desire, with or without allowing me to orgasm. Your frustration is sort of self-imposed; you can end it at any time. I, on the other hand, have no choice but to suffer through the frustration until you are willing to grant me release. You have to admit, those are two completely different experiences.

Lady: Ah true but what good is getting it anytime I want when I get to enjoy all the build up before I do finally allow it and/or take it? Living in an aroused state is a wonderful feeling… but frustrating still the same 🙂 Yes, if I wanted it, I could come to you, unlock that beautiful ready and willing cock and slowly slide it in my already wet pussy and make you cum within a few thrusts… but what’s the fun in that when while you are in your super aroused state you are so sweet, physically loving and mega attentive. Once you cum that’s all over for at least a week!

cm: Ugghhhhh…. how much longer until I’m out????

Lady: Well let’s just say you’re going to be a needy, aching, desperate mess by the time Christmas gets here and I’m going to love every single minute of it 🙂