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Mail Chastity: Punishment

Posted by Lady M on June 3, 2018
Posted in: Advice, Mail Chastity. Tagged: , , , , . 3 comments

D & J are a couple that read our blog. They recently sent an email asking for help with appropriate punishment. I’m extremely lucky in having a very good boy who does not push the boundaries so punishment doesn’t not come up often. It’s not something I enjoy having to do.

D & J wrote:

This weekend I have gone away for a few days, on Thursday night my cage worked itself off and I couldn’t get it back on as the key is 2.5 hrs away.
On Thursday night I edged myself once, haven’t done anything else but this is a serious infraction in our relationship.
Previous punishments have been whipping, and a few minutes with clover clamps. Extending chastity has never been a punishment as my wife has never set a time frame to extend until now.
Can you suggest an appropriate punishment please?

My suggestion for punishment may not be like others since I’m not too big into giving them. When it comes to punishment for us I take things away from Cagedmonkey, such as parts of my body, pleasing me or even playing video games. There have been times where I took away chastity and any attention to his penis. Those things really are punishment for him because he enjoys our play and taking that away is really the best way to keep him in line. I don’t really use spanking, etc for punishment as that is more “funishment.”

So the reason for this post is to ask our readers what their suggestions would be in this situation for punishment. What have you or your Mistress done as punishment in this situation? If you haven’t been in this situation, what would you do? What do you feel is an appropriate punishment for edging without permission?

Please comment here in the comment section so D & J can read your responses!! Thanks 🙂

You’ll Cum When I Say So

Posted by Lady M on June 2, 2018
Posted in: FemDom, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, orgasm control, Orgasm Denial, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , , . 6 comments

This weekend is Cagedmonkey’s birthday weekend. His actual birthday is on Monday, so I decided the weekend before I would spend overloading him on orgasms. My plan is to try to make him cum so much he’s actually asking me to STOP making him orgasm. Once he’s to the point that he can’t physically orgasm anymore, I plan to use the vibrator to overstimulate him as much as possible.

You may be wondering why I plan to do this and the simple answer is that, starting on his birthday, he’s going to be locked and denied for an indefinite amount of time. I’m thinking a good 6 months of denial sounds good to start. Once we get there I may, or may not, make him go another 6. 🙂 The actual lock up won’t be that long but I am planning on having him go 24/7 for a good chunk of time. I want him aching in the pit of his stomach, desperately needing to get hard and even wanting to orgasm.

I can’t wait to flaunt the fact that I get to have as many orgasms as I was, as much as I want, and even get to make him provide me the pleasure of those orgasms. I very much love to see and feel how frustrated he is when he’s aching for sexual attention and so jealous of my orgasms and the orgasms of others! It’s fun when friends brag to him about the orgasms they get to have when he’s locked and denied and wanting one so bad.

It should be a fun year 🙂

Mail Chastity: How to be a Good Submissive

Posted by Lady M on May 24, 2018
Posted in: Advice, D/s, Female Led Relationship, FemDom, Mail Chastity. Tagged: , , , , , . 3 comments

Not too long ago I got asked this question and while I get asked questions frequently, I wanted to put this particular question in its own Mail Chastity post. It’s such a loaded question and it will take much more than a paragraph to answer. As a matter of fact I could do a whole podcast on this question alone. So anyway, here is what I was asked:

“Good morning Lady M! …what makes a good submissive. I am curious as to your personal opion.“

I have many opinions on what makes a good submissive but the super short, honest answer is – being what your Dominant wants.

That answer is also so incredibly vague! No one, absolutely no one can tell you how to be a good sub. The reason I say that is because every single Dom is their own person and every single sub is their own. They all have wants, needs and desires. The ultimate in being a good Dom or sub is having a Dom or sub that compliments your needs, wants and desires. What it takes to be a good sub is getting to know the person you want to be submissive to. Making sure you know what they want and expect out of a submissive. Once you know that and have learned those boundaries then you know exactly how to be a good sub. It takes work and communication, on both sides, to really understand what the other would consider good.

Let me give you an example of what I mean. I am a very loving, mothering Domme. I am also a very service driven Domme. I enjoy being in control and taking care of people. I like being the one to dictate how Cagedmonkey’s day will be, making his lunch and helping him know what to expect from his day. I also get extremely fulfilled by someone doing things for me, without my asking (most of the time), because they thought of me and wanted to make things easier or less for me. You know those times when CM will be home from work and do dishes or clean and vacuum the living room because he just knows I’m at work too and it will be helpful and make less for me to do when I get home… Those things, in my eyes, make him a good submissive husband. However, that’s only one side of being “good.” I also love that CM is exactly what I need sexually. When I’m feeling hardcore, rough and aggressive, I love that he can take what I am needing to give. When I’m feeling loving and cuddly, I love that he can hold me and love me and be that for me. When I want to be pleased sexually, CM is there to please me how I need it. Whether that’s eating my pussy, making me cum, or just being my sex toy to hump and play with. Those things make him a good sub for me.

What makes him good for me, though, may not be good for someone else. Someone else may want certain rituals daily, tasks that must be completed, hard rules that must be followed or there will be punishment. There are also subs out there that have that need. Strict rules to follow with punishment if they are not. Following those rules and taking that punishment would be what makes them a good submissive.

Basically, what I’m saying is… It takes getting to know someone and communicating to find out what will make you a good sub. I hope, in some way, for some one, this was helpful. There is no one way, no right or wrong way. The whole thing comes down to what works in the relationship and in the dynamic.

Feeling that Power

Posted by Lady M on May 22, 2018
Posted in: D/s, FemDom, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , . 5 comments

A few minutes ago, Cagedmonkey, left for work. As he turned to walk out the door I pulled his pants down, pushed him against the door and grabbed his ass and groped his body and caged cock. Then I turned him around and grabbed him by the throat and back of his head and kissed him hard.

In that moment, I felt so powerful over him. I love feeling powerful, especially sexually. I love feeling in charge of my own pleasure and his. I love to feel his body almost melt at my powerful touch. I love hearing his moans as I grab him and forcefully kiss him and bite his lips.

I know that if he didn’t have to leave for work I would have very forcefully fucked him in that moment. I would have made him pleasure my pussy with his mouth and tongue and then slide his thick rock hard aching cock inside… If he were uncaged, of course. I could totally see myself grabbing the sides of his head and shoving his face in my pussy, rubbing it all over him.

I love when I’m feeling powerful like this, forceful and aggressive. I know that CM likes it too. I love that feeling of taking what I want, when I want it.

So Comfortable

Posted by Lady M on May 19, 2018
Posted in: Marriage, Uncategorized. Tagged: , , . 4 comments

It’s weird to think that being entangled with another person could be considered comfortable. Cagedmonkey and I both can’t believe how incredible it feels to lay like this with one another. We laid on the couch like this today, and he may have humped against my legs a bit hehe, and at one point we were so comfortable we just fell asleep. I’ve never done that with anyone, ever. I’ve never felt that comfortable. I love that he and I have this. That, even after all this time, we still feel this way and can be this comfortable with each other.

It’s not always about the kinky, intense stuff. Sometimes it’s just about this amazing connection. That doesn’t mean I didn’t tell him he needs to go shower and shave his bits for me tonight so they are nice and sexy and smooth. I’m hoping to get in a little play time tonight. He needs a good teasing and edging. I want to make sure he’s good and horny for when I have him locked for an extended amount of time starting at his birthday.

Anyway, just a little fun tidbit I thought I’d share with you all today.

Leaving a Legacy: Mistress Ivey

Posted by Lady M on March 16, 2018
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, FemDom, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , , . 12 comments

When cagedmonkey and I first started out with chastity and realized we’ve always been living an FLR it was because of Mistress Ivey and her amazing, easy to read, down to earth books and website, Becoming a Mistress. I’m extremely appreciative of the work she’d put into all of it so that I could become a better wife and woman in charge of her husband.

Yesterday, I lost a friend. Today I take a moment to remember an amazing woman and her hubby, who’ve I’ve gotten to know much more deeply, on a much more personal level, in the past few years. I’m sad to learn of Mistress Ivey’s passing but I know that she’s left behind an awesome legacy and she will not easily be forgotten. She will be forever missed and we are sending our love prayers and love out to her husband and the rest of the family. She was a wonderful author, woman, wife and mother.

Thank you for all of the knowledge you have shared through the years and all of the experience you leave behind. Even though you are not physically with us you will continue to teach and mentor as the years go on.

Before Bed and Morning Sex

Posted by Lady M on March 15, 2018
Posted in: Male Chastity, Sex. Tagged: , , , , . 3 comments

This morning, I had the pleasure of waking up to an orgasm and then a nice good morning kiss to the pussy when cagedmonkey stuck his face in it afterwards. I know we’ve said it in the past but there is something amazing about morning sex. I really do love starting the day in such a sexually charged way. Plus, that means I’m typically sending hubby off to work drippy in his cage and frustrated.

Last night was pretty amazing too. Right before bed cagedmonkey gave me a “tongue massage” as I like to call it. I absolutely love when he runs his hands all over my body. Not rubbing or pushing into the muscles because a lot of times they are too sore to touch but simply touching my skin, open handed running his palm across my back or butt or anything! It feels so good! So same thing, when he starts licking and kissing my body, it feels awesome! It gets me giggly, and so turned on when he shows all the parts of my body love and attention, not just the sexual ones.

Last night, ended up with him licking and kissing me all over my back while he fingered my pussy from behind… That was, yet again, another fantastic way to fall asleep! 🙂 I mean, maybe not so much for cagedmonkey, physically, since he was completely rooty in his cage after that and had to calm down before falling asleep.

Overstimulation and Old School Tease

Posted by Lady M on March 4, 2018
Posted in: Bondage, orgasm control, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , . 4 comments

Earlier this week I expressed, to cagedmonkey, how much I’d been missing the nightly teasings, like we used to do, and having him bound to the bed. I miss the way things were in the beginning when he was almost constantly horny and edged and we would ruin orgasms. You know, all that fun stuff that comes with orgasm control and me being in control of his sexual pleasure.

So last night I had cagedmonkey unlock, before we went to munch even, because I played with him a little in the car on the way and even gave him a couple good cock squeezes while we were there. It certainly helps when I have a Mistress for a best friend who was sending him pictures of her sucking one of the dicks she owns. Those types of pictures and someone willing to flaunt their sexual fun are always helpful in keeping CM very horny and frustrated. Hehe I have the bestest friends, don’t I? 🙂

After were got home, I took him into the bedroom for some playtime. I secured his wrists and ankles to the bed using our under bed restraints. By the way, they are getting old and soon I’ll need new cuffs for them! Anyway, I got him tightened down and he was already getting hard! I love that more and more he’s becoming the “hair trigger horny” that I love so much. Each time I tell him to go edge himself it takes less than a minute to get hard and on edge! It’s amazing!

I spent the a good amount of time stroking his cock, edging and teasing him with the wand. For the last half an hour of our little session there I alternating putting the wand on his sensitive spot juuuuuuuuust to the point he might cum and then I’d take it and place it directly on the tip of his penis and just vibrate it and overstimulate the head of his cock until he was wiggling and pulling against the restraints. I loved hearing every moan and groan and whimper.

I did end up doing a little bit of “post orgasm torture” but don’t think he got a typical orgasm. I certainly ruined the hell out of his orgasm with the wand and his overstimulated head. He was really whimpering during that. I very much enjoyed having some old school teasing with CM last night. He really seemed to be effected and I know he’s feeling frustrated today.

15yrs of Marriage – Rope Bondage, Chastity, Tease & Denial – Part 2

Posted by Lady M on February 4, 2018
Posted in: Bondage, FemDom, Marriage, orgasm control, Pictures, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , . 4 comments

I always knew I liked bondage. I like the vulnerable, helplessness of it. I get so turned on knowing that I have someone so completely dependant on me. Which is likely why I enjoy the control of an FLR and chastity. I just never knew how much I enjoyed it, until cagedmonkey and I had some time to really play with rope on our anniversary weekend. I got to finally get him bound in such a sexy amazing way with his calves bound to his thighs and wrists bound behind his back.

I’m glad we had time to practice beforehand because I really think I did a good job getting him bound in the rope. The purple rope looks amazing on him too.

I feel like my rope tying skills can only get better from here. He certainly couldn’t move his legs apart from themselves but I wanted to make sure he was completely bound so I used another rope to bind his ankles and then his wrists.

I had so much fun with him tied up this way. One of cagedmonkey’s kinks is to be taken advantage of while completely vulnerable. So I spent a good amount of time tickling the living hell out of him. He hates tickling so much. I teased him verbally and just loved every single reaction that came out of him. My pussy got so incredibly wet during it all as well. It was dripping and I even climbed up and let him feel it as I rubbed it on his back and left him with a huge gooey wet spot.

After over an hour bound in the rope I felt he’d had enough. His face was beet red, his eyes were watering and I can just imagine how his muscles felt. The marks that were left from the ropes were exquisite. I admired them as I removed each loop.

I can’t wait to have another weekend where we can play with the rope again. I’d like to find some other awesome ways to get him bound. Of course, I also want to think of other fun things to do to him while he’s so completely helpless and vulnerable. We definitely want to get him into more predicament type stuff.

15yrs of Marriage – Rope Bondage, Chastity, Tease & Denial – Part 1

Posted by Lady M on February 4, 2018
Posted in: Bondage, FemDom, Marriage, orgasm control, Tease & Denial. Tagged: , , , , , . 4 comments

A couple of weeks ago cagedmonkey and I celebrated our 15 year wedding anniversary. We had a weekend to ourselves to celebrate, thanks to Grandma. My morning, on Saturday, started with a naked subby hubby cooking me a delicious breakfast. Then, we enjoyed relaxing together as I had planned a full day of control over him. I had decided our weekend together would be a complete, and I mean complete, control weekend. He was to ask for everything, eat when/if I allowed him to, drink whatever I told him to. I even enjoyed a snack while allowing him a snack as well.

A little while ago I picked up a new bondage item and wanted to try it out first. So I had cagedmonkey lay down on his stomach and put him in the new… harness, I guess I’ll call it. It forced him to have his legs up and his back arched and head up while his wrists were cuffed near his chest. The awesome part of this thing was that I could totally get on all fours in front of him and force him to eat my pussy and ass and there was nothing he could do about it.

Once I was sufficiently satisfied and he was covered in my pussy juices, I stood up and simply said, “I’ll be back.” I left him there, laying on the floor, bound in that position, smelling me while I took a long, hot, shower. He had no clue when I would be back or what was in store for him when I did return. I’m sure he was aching with anticipation. After my shower, I came back and laid my fresh, clean, shaved pussy in his face and made him lick me to orgasm.

I did finally allow him out of the harness and I told him we were going in the bedroom so he could please me where I was comfortable. I had him uncage my big thick cock, however he was still not allowed to feel inside my warm, very wet pussy. The only thing I allowed him to do was set his cock on my clit while I used the wand to have another orgasm.

Such a tease to be so close but still unable to feel my pussy squeeze around his cock.

While I was enjoying my orgasm, cagedmoney really didn’t enjoy that I left him with a ruined orgasm, all over my pussy lips.

The poor guy so desperately wanted to feel me. I loved seeing the anguish on his face. I love causing him so much frustration… So much that I can see it on his face. I love knowing he wants, so badly, what in in control of. All of the sexual pleasure he’s aching for and only I get to give it to him… or not!

I’ve decided to break this anniversary weekend, post into two, so please continue reading about what happened in the evening here in Part 2!