Wife Led Marriage

Conversations in Chastity: It’s Tough For Us Keyholders, Too!

Posted by cagedmonkey on April 15, 2014
Posted in: Conversations, Female Led Relationship, Male Chastity, Marriage, Orgasm Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 4 comments

Lady M: I can’t get enough of feeling your body, touching you all over.

cagedmonkey: I love the way you touch me.

LM: I want to touch you all over. I miss your cock.

cm: Yeah, about that… can I ask you something out-of-role?

LM: Sure, baby. What’s up?

cm: It seems like lately you’ve been really missing my cock… I’d say almost as much as I do, but that’s pretty much impossible. But I’m getting the vibe that it’s starting to take its toll on you too. Do you want my help with finishing the whole month you planned to have me locked 24/7? If you start to break down, do you want me to remind you?

LM: I’ll be okay. When I tell you that I miss you cock, I’m just expressing myself. I’m not going to pretend that I don’t miss it.

cm: Good, I don’t want you to pretend. I also kinda like it that you miss it.

LM: Right. See, I can’t play that “hard ass Domme” role like I don’t want your hard cock. This stuff is hard on me too, you know.

cm: I know, but I need to know how bad you want this. Because I obviously want out of the cage, and if you start getting weak I can’t guarantee what I’ll try to talk you into it. But if you REALLY want this to happen, I’ll try my best not to push it. We may need to work together when we try to stretch to new limits.

LM: I do want to make it. I will let you know if I need your help. It’s only a few weeks, I should be able to make it.

cm: You say “only a few weeks” as if it’s not that much time. To me, it’s “a few weeks!”

LM: Only a few weeks until I get to wrap my hand around that big fat cock of yours.

cm: Mmmmm, I love it when you describe it like that!

LM: Well, it is big and fat… but only when I allow it to be.  😉

Books I Would Recommend to Keyholders & Couples in Chastity

Posted by Lady M on April 14, 2014
Posted in: Advice, Chastity Device, Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Marriage, Orgasm Denial, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 6 comments

If you’ve been reading our blog you’re already familiar with the fact that I am a huge researcher. When I’m interested in something I search the hell out of it on the internet and I love physical (& ebooks) books. As a new Keyholder I was happy to find that there were actually a few books out there for Keyholders and about male chastity. I have been into tease & denial since cagedmonkey and I got together but it is always great to find a book to give some ideas for that as well.

Below are just some of the books I’ve read on these subjects; well the ones I care to review and recommend to other Keyholders.

In all my research I was extremely happy when I found those certain key words to search that brought me to the websites with real life male chastity information. People who are married, love each other and live the lifestyle how they want it to be. Btw, those magic key words? Yeah, I finally got around to using “male chastity and/in marriage.” What a huge difference that made in weeding out the fantasy world.

That’s when I found Thumper’s blog as well as Sarah Jameson’s blog.I found that Sarah had written books that were available on her site and that is what got me started on hunting down books.
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Sarah’s book main book (if she’s still selling it) is a bit pricey however she does have a couple free ebooks. Her tease & denial guide and guide to male chastity & orgasm denial (no I don’t feel it’s a “complete guide” but it’s a good read anyway) are pretty good for a Keyholder who might also be new at tease and denial. You can also sign up for free emails from her that do offer some good advice.
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I can tell you that Sarah’s book is a pretty good book. It’s a very gentle, easy read and focuses on male chastity in a marriage. It really would be great for a very vanilla wife looking for information on this lifestyle. Though with all the other books out there, now, it’s hard to justify the cost of her book (which was an ebook/pdf when I got it). 🙂 I think it could be a great resource if she lowered the price and possibly offered it in print format.

A couple of cheaper books are available on Amazon.com. Georgia Ivey Green has a book “A Keyholder’s Handbook: A Womans guide to male chastity”
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This book has some good advice for a keyholder on chastity but be aware she also talks about some other fetishes such as feminization, humiliation and others. This book is less than $10.00 and well worth it in my opinion. As with any self help type book, you take what applies to you and leave the rest. Nothing is the end all authority on how to live your FLR or chastity lifestyle.

Mistress Ivey also has another book “How to setup an FLR” which is a great read if you are also looking to expand your chastity lifestyle to include a Female Led aspect.
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This book gives a couple a lot to think about in regards to what they each want from their relationship. It has questions for both partners to see where they are in terms of flr. We used this book to help write our chastity agreement.

Another book available from Amazon and is more vanilla than Mistress Ivey’s book but is an excellent starters guide is “Male Chastity: A Guide for Keyholders” by Lucy Fairbourne.
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This book is in both paperback and ebook format which is also around $10.00. It’s well worth it again in my opinion. If you are looking for a book to start with or to introduce your wife/partner to chastity and being your Keyholder, this would be it. As the book states it is a very “non-threatening, female-friendly introduction to the topic of male chastity, ideal for nervous keyholders or as a love-offering from a would-be-chastened male.” This book is a gentle approach to the subject and written in a very matter-of-fact style. It really is the perfect way to introduce this kink.

I try to give my honest opinions on the things I use or read. I hope that they are helpful to those who check out our blog and those looking to get started in this wonderful lifestyle. We love and embrace both the chastity and flr/wlm parts of our relationship.

Please feel free to add your own opinions of these books in the comments. If others are anything like me they would love to hear more than just one point of view.

Sentenced to the Jailbird

Posted by cagedmonkey on April 8, 2014
Posted in: Chastity Device, Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Orgasm Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . 4 comments

So the HUGE piece of news I teased in my last post was already spoiled by ML in her last post, unbeknownst to me: My Lady has decided to keep me in the Jailbird 24/7 until the May 4th. No removing the cage. Not even a cursory release for my poor cock. I will be locked up for the next 26 days straight.

624 hours.

37,440 minutes.

2,246,400 second.

Not like I’m counting or anything.

My Lady and I have talked about trying this for quite some time. When we were discussing it, it really turned me on. How would I respond to not having an erection for an entire month? How will I feel after it’s been so long since I’ve seen my cock get hard? How will it feel when my cock is finally free of the steel and can swell to its full size?

Now that it’s happening, it’s a little bit overwhelming. Although ML has caved in the past and given me mercy during some of these “extended” times or denial or lockup, I have a feeling she’s not going to crack so easily this time. She’s very curious about the reactions she can coax out of me. If I start getting desperate, she may just grow to love it. Who knows? Maybe I won’t even be getting out until my next Maybe Day in June? No clue. No control over it.

Right now, I’m a little stunned. I know for a fact I’m really going to miss my hardon. I like it when my cock gets hard. It feels nice. I’ve come to enjoy the feeling of my cock pressing against the steel cage, but it doesn’t compare to the feeling of my cock getting nice and thick and big when I’m turned on. The longest we’ve ever done a 24/7 lockup stint is ten days I think, and I started to get a little antsy near the end of that time. I went into what ML likes to call “bargaining mode,” which is when I start to try to make a deal with her in order to get just the tiniest need filled. For example, near the end of that ten day period, I was literally begging ML to give me a ruined orgasm, just so she’d let me out and touch me. Again: I begged My Lady to give me an utterly frustrating ruined orgasm just because I needed to get hard and be touched. This was after ten days. I wonder what My Lady will have me doing by the end of this run.

Bondage Rope & Forced Masturbation

Posted by Lady M on April 8, 2014
Posted in: Chastity Device, Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Sex, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , . 2 comments

Last night was a pretty interesting night! I finally unlocked cagedmonkey and made him touch his own penis. It’s been almost a month since he’s put his own hands on his penis. I have unlocked him for various things in the past month but he has been restrained when out of his cage.

I decided since he hasn’t touched or stroked himself that I would force him to masturbate and use his own hand to edge and tease him. His hand touches all those spots he’s used to feeling while spending a good portion of his life masturbating (as you boys know you do!). So I tied our bondage rope around cagedmonkey’s wrist and hand while his cock was in hand. I left myself a piece of rope as a handle and used it to pull his hand up and down the shaft of his hard aching cock.

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I loved listening to him moan and squirm and wiggle was I forced his hand up and down stroking himself to the edge over and over. I forced him to do this for probably a half an hour, on top of the half an hour or so I spent rubbing, licking, sucking, tickling and even smacking his cock. 🙂 Of course he was squirming so much that I had to make sure he was secured so I got a bit creative with the rope. My pussy just kept getting more and more soaked as I listened to him grunt and moan and groan.

I untied his hand from his cock and instead I secured both hands to his thighs with the rope. It worked like a charm so that I could spend a good amount of time teasing him and he couldn’t move.

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Not only did I tease his denied cock, I also sat on his face and rubbed my pussy all over it making him lick me until I came. Then I really did a number on him by sliding down, facing his feet, and sitting on his very sensitive cock. I teased him, sliding very slowly up and down on him as he watched from behind. I reached back and spread myself wide so he could see every bit of himself being grabbed and gobbled up by my hungry pussy. He just moaned so loud cussing over and over, pushing his head back and clenching his eyes closed so he didn’t go over the edge.

I do believe that last night’s tease was quite intense but I suppose you’d need to hear from him how it made him feel. It certainly was a wonderful birthday for me because it ended in my making him eat my pussy for a good hour while I had extremely intense orgasms… over and over. My thighs were shaking, I squeezed his head between my legs and bucked like a wild horse.

It really was an extremely fantastic night. Especially falling asleep together naked which, with kids, is something we rarely do.

Cagedmonkey is back in his Jail Bird where he will stay with zero release until May 4th. I have plans for him on May 4th as we travel. 🙂 You’ll just have to wait to hear all about that, though!

Birthday Gift For a Husband in Chastity

Posted by Lady M on April 7, 2014
Posted in: Chastity Device, Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . 1 comment

IT’S THIS LADY’S BIRTHDAY TODAY!!!

Yeah, you know you read that title thinking it was cagedmonkey’s birthday, right? Well it’s not! It’s mine, but, that doesn’t mean I don’t have some special plans for my locked up hubby man. Don’t be mistaken thinking my denied guy is going to get an orgasm because that is just not in the cards today. He WILL still be waiting until his birthday in June for that… or at least that long (perhaps I’ll deny him until Christmas!).

Today, it’s been almost a month since cagedmonkey has touched his own penis. If he has been unlocked he’s been restrained and not allowed to touch. If I have unlocked him, I’ve been the one to remove and replace his cage. He’s dying to stroke himself, let alone just touch himself in general. So my plan for later is to unlock him and use our bondage rope to tie his own hand to his penis so I can pull up on the rope and force him to stroke himself. He really wants to touch himself but I’m going to force him to do it how I want him to. He won’t really have a choice in HOW he gets to touch himself. 🙂

I’m really getting into the bondage rope and I’m going to buy myself more. We even bought a book to learn knots and techniques, but that’s for an entirely different post!

It should be a pretty interesting thing and I’ll be sure to take pictures and share how our little adventures go tonight. I’m really looking forward to his reactions – you should know by now how much of a reaction junkie I am – and sharing it with all of you! 🙂

Holy Crap! What Am I Capable Of?

Posted by Lady M on April 4, 2014
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Sex, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , . 2 comments

Oh my goodness gracious, great balls of fire! I just went upstairs and I was getting my little freak on with hubby. I was kissing, licking, sucking and biting him in various spots. I was getting all “growly turned on,” you might call it primal. It was freakin crazy with him moaning and me getting more and more into it.

I was all set to head back downstairs after my little visit but something struck me. I realized I haven’t made cagedmonkey wear the njoy butt plug in awhile. We’ve just been so busy it hasn’t come up. So before I headed back down I inserted it and explained to him (in a sexy whisper in his ear) that I’m taking control of his sexual sensations for the entire night. I told him he will wear the butt plug the entire day and he will also wear it out to date night tonight AND to work. That’s something I’ve never made him do yet but, hey, there’s a first time for everything! I am a nice Keyholder and I did tell him the ONLY reason he would be allowed to remove it would be to go to the bathroom (if you know what I mean). He is to replace it when he is finished though. I also explained if he got uncomfortable, too bad and if he got really uncomfortable he would be allowed to add some lube.

I got so very very turned on during all of that! I ended up forcefully pushing him onto his belly and positioning myself on his ever so sexy ass. I started grinding on him and could feel my pussy get wetter and wetter. Oh I can’t even explain how freakin turned on I was! While I was doing it cagedmonkey turned his head back toward me and whispered how he was starting to feel like my little slut. That did something in me and I said, “oh yeah?” I put my hand on the back of his head and shoved his face in the pillow and told him how I know he liked me treating him like a little whore. I told him soon he would be being me to fuck him like my dirty little whore, begging me to cum while I fucked his ass so hard, deep and fast. This type of aggressive talk went on for a bit and I could feel myself getting lost in it all. I could feel myself slipping into top space.

I abruptly stopped, got up and said, “I have to get out of here.” As I was walking out I told him to get some sleep and that I loved him but that I had to go.

I knew I had to get out of there once I felt myself doing that because our daughter was just down the stairs doing some school work on the computer. I was worried I would lose it completely, get carried away and get too loud or something. I could feel that I could have easily fucked him so hard at that moment. I felt that I easily could have gotten caught up in the moment and treated him like a little whore, like a piece of meat and just used and abused his body. I’m not sure what I would have been capable of doing if our daughter wasn’t downstairs at that moment.

Sometimes I surprise myself with the feelings I get in the midst of a tease session. I surprise myself with the things I say. I get nervous, in a way, of what I might be capable of during that.

Our Mystery Date

Posted by Lady M on April 1, 2014
Posted in: KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , . Leave a Comment

Last night cagedmonkey took me out to a nice bar & grill not too far from the house. When we were younger we use to go out every so often (usually when visiting my friends and family out of state) and do karaoke. I’ve recently said how we need to get back out doing those things we used to love doing. So cagedmonkey looked up a bar that had karaoke and decided we were going. We had such a fun night eating appetizers and having a few drinks and just talking. We spent a good time talking about goals and our thoughts and feelings about how our relationship is going. We also talked about the chastity and how we each feel it’s going and If anything needed adjusting. It really was a good night. We didn’t stay out too late since our babysitter had school in the morning! 🙂

During our date we talked a bit about how I’d like to learn some rope skills to get into tying him up more. So once we got home we did a little research and I actually learned how to make rope cuffs. I practiced on him. What I really want (we need lots more rope) is to be able to tie him to a chair. 🙂

After a little practicing with the rope we were going to watch a little tv but I got my paddle instead. I haven’t given cagedmonkey a good spanking in awhile so I had him bend over the couch. I spanked his ass while I played with his caged cock. I ran my fingernails on his shaft through the cage bars. I massaged and fondled his balls and loved hearing him moan. I even grasped around the base of his cock just behind his ring and stroked the base of his cock. We didn’t get too much more into anything than that but we had a fantastic night as a whole. 🙂

Here We Are Again – 3 Weeks Denied Orgasm

Posted by Lady M on March 29, 2014
Posted in: Chastity Device, Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Sex, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , . 8 comments

The longest we’ve made it in tease and denial is one month in our 14 years together and I just have to ask myself why? Cagedmonkey has been denied orgasm for 3 weeks now. This is the third or fourth time, since we got into this whole chastity thing, where we’ve gotten to the 3-4 week mark. I realized something last night as we were having a little sexy sex time.

Yesterday morning was a particularly mind fucking morning. I just love tucking hubby in and whispering all kinds of crazy, dirty, naughty things in his ear while I grind on him and have an orgasm. It really just drives him completely bonkers. What was worse yesterday morning was that I unlocked him, rubbed my wet pussy on his ass while I held his rock hard erection in my hand against the bed. I did those little teases often throughout the day yesterday, even used his cock a few times and then by last night he’s was highly hair trigger aroused. So much so that he could barely look me in the eye without almost cumming. Let alone moving while his cock was in my pussy.

I could see in his face how truly and completely frustrated he was, it looked almost painful. That’s when I started to notice my Dominant Keyholder feelings going from “haha this is funny” to “oh no my poor baby” and feeling bad and sorry for cagedmonkey. I kept thinking to myself maybe I should just let him cum. That was exactly when I realized THAT is the whole reason we don’t make it past a month. I start to see the real, not funny anymore frustration and my brain automatically wants to switch to “making him feel better” mode.

The best part about this whole chastity thing is that our communication is super fantastic. So last night I needed to have a conversation with hubby about this. When we first started out we had to work together just to get past the first couple days and then weeks but after talking last night we realized we are at a spot where we need to work together again to get over this hurdle.

We talked about what I felt I needed to be ok with pushing him further. Obviously I’m having emotional/psychological issues with it. We came to the conclusion that, not during teasing or denial, but after I really need to hear that he actually likes that I denied him. I need praise and encouragement to know that I’m not really hurting him or doing something that will cause him to resent me or have anger toward me. I know I have some abandonment issues so that helps when we are trying to figure out what I need. I need to know that deep down he IS enjoying our play and what I put him through (or at least loves to hate it and wants to not want it haha) and that I’m not going to push him away and make him leave me. Yes, to the “normals” that might sound crazy but buried somewhere in my brain that is the root of my loss of confidence.

I’m just glad we can talk and work these things out to make our game the most fun it can be. Communication is key in any relationship but even more so in chastity, tease and denial our any kinky relationship.

Sick Keyholder – Anxiety & Regaining Confidence

Posted by Lady M on March 26, 2014
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , . Leave a Comment

Being sick for this long has really taken a toll on this Keyholder. I haven’t had that physical connection with cagedmonkey since Saturday. I mean we’ve tried but how long can you actually kiss with a stuffy nose before gasping for air? We’ve tried to be touchy feely and while that feels good I’m dealing with a tummy getting nauseous at the same time. My nose is all sore from blowing it constantly and my lips are all chapped. It’s really sexy, I tell ya.

I feel like my confidence has taken a hit in all of this as well. Usually, daily, I’m seeing or feeling a reaction to my aggression/dominance but since we’ve been sick there really hasn’t been any. We’ve haven’t felt like teasing really or anything like that in the past few days either.

Last night I was feeling some pretty yucky anxiety. Cagedmonkey, being sick, has been home from work more nights this week than normal. I usually have a little trouble on his first night back to work after being off, anyway, but last night got me particularly hard. I guess I should have prepared myself better for him going but I didn’t. So yeah, I had him get on his knees in front of me and hold me while I told him I was having a hard time. Cagedmonkey knows me very well after all these years and knows what I need to help me through.

Maybe this all sounds lame to some and not very becoming of a big bad ass Keyholder but it’s reality. I’m a little nutty and insecure sometimes and I’m just glad my subby hubby loves me and cares enough to give me what I need to push through and regain my composure and confidence.

Ya see, all that wonderful love he showed last night really helped when he got home from work this morning. I went up to tuck him in and unlocked his cage to release the sexiness within. He’s still not allowed to touch himself until my birthday, in a week and a half, so I put him in the bondage mittens. I had him get on his side and I spooned him and gave him quite the mind fucking while stroking his cock. Telling him all the things I could force him to do. Making him watch as I was fondling his cock and stroking him, something he hasn’t done in 16 days. I just love feeling that big thick hard cock in my hand. I had him so extremely turned on that he gushed precum onto my hand. I really enjoy getting him to that point.

One of the things that really got a good reaction out of him was when I told him how I could spoon him while wearing the strap-on. I explained in a sexy whisper how I could hold his cock in my hand and the only way he would be stroked was if he would push back against me. He would basically have to penetrate and violate himself to get any pleasure for his cock. What a dilemma! Such a humiliating thing to do just to feel that stroke on his shaft!

Hehe that really got him breathing heavy and moaning slightly. He even started to buck against me a bit too. I really think he liked the idea of being forced to do something he hated if he wanted any pleasure.

Such fun in teasing the mind. I’m also happy to feel myself getting back into the groove, so to speak.

Naked Lunch and More: Part 2

Posted by Lady M on March 25, 2014
Posted in: Female Led Relationship, KeyHolder, Male Chastity, Sex, Tease & Denial, Wife Led Marriage. Tagged: , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a Comment

Ok to continue on from what happened in part 1 of our 5 hours at home alone…

I decided it was time to give cagedmonkey’s cock a good long teasing. What a great time for it too since he was all tied up and hooded. I edged him for quite awhile, stroking him over and over, stopping just before he could get any pleasure. Then it was time to see what my wand could do. I vibrated various places on his cock and balls and at different speeds just seeing what reactions I would get. I think I spent a good half hour just testing out what spots did what. I just loved watching him squirm and moan.
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Something I’ve wanted to try for some time was tying the vibrator to cagedmonkey’s balls and to leave him there to endure. So I went to our little box of tricks and got the bondage rope. I tied the wand to his balls and wrapped it around him and then the door knob. It was an interesting setup and made it nice and easy to play with him from the door way. After I got him tied up, I put in the porn dvd and got it to a nice spot where all he could hear was fucking. I whispered to him through the hood to enjoy and I would be back… I was going to take a shower. 🙂
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He was left that way for about a half hour while I went downstairs. I was totally loving hearing him whimper and moan upstairs, there was no way I could take a shower. I got myself some milk and cookies and enjoyed listening to him. When I thought he’d had enough I went up and untied him, let him loose and gave him some loving aftercare. That’s actually one of my favorite parts, holding his head on my chest, making him feel good. Letting him know everything is ok, how proud I am of him for taking what I put him through. I love taking care of my subby hubby.