chastity, male chastity

All posts tagged chastity, male chastity

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So, ML’s post let the cat out of the bag and it has now turned into the elephant in the room – I won’t be having an orgasm in 2016. Honestly, that sounds a hell of a lot worse than “I won’t have an orgasm for a year,” and I’m not quite sure why that is. Maybe because it’s so definite, so final… and it also says nothing of when my next orgasm will be…. Ok, I’m going to stop right there before I start putting more ideas into My Lady’s head. 🙂

Now that this is going to be a reality, I can’t help but think back to how we got this far. I can vividly remember one of the first few conversations ML and I had about our goals for chastity and orgasm denial. My goal was to eventually be made to go a year with an orgasm; ML wasn’t so ambitious. When I asked her if it would ever be a possibility, first she answered, “I don’t know.” Then, following a good pestering from me, she said, “Probably not.”

I’ll admit, I was a little disappointed. I wondered what it would be like to be that desperate, so needy after a year of no orgasms, and what it would feel like to finally have one. But I also understood where she was coming from. We hadn’t even started practicing yet, we were still working out the details (so to speak). Looking at an entire year of denial wasn’t just putting the cart before the horse, it was filling up the cart before even buying a horse. I was just happy that we were communicating honestly and openly, and we were willing to try this together.

I never expected ML to get as far as even considering a year denial for me. It was always one of those “what if” fantasies, but it grew less and less important as our sex life got more and more amazing. Little did I know that My Lady was building up her tolerance for denying me.

Now it seems like my fantasy will come true. And, to be honest, it’s not a “be careful what you wish for” situation – I’m very excited to try this! I know there will be times where I hate it and I want it to end, but I love being sexually controlled by My Lady. Also, being insanely horny, almost constantly turned on, and desperate to cum pretty much all day every day is an AMAZING experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything.

Although, nine months from now, I might feel differently about that and be willing to trade it for a nice good hard orgasm. 🙂

I get questions all the time from other wives or girlfriends who have their guys in chastity. Some of the most frequently asked questions are about how I keep things fresh, how I keep him teased, how I remind him of my control over his cock. Honestly, I’ve said it before, chastity is not a “lock it and leave it” thing. Chastity takes a little work on the keyholders part. Unless of course it’s your kink to be locked up and the key tossed away never to be used again. That is certainly not how most… no, all, of the guys I know want it. They want to feel the control, the tease, the denial. They do not want to be locked up and forgotten about. So, how do I possibly make time to keep him teased and denied and reminded of my control?

A lot of this is mental, so there is that. The words and phrases I choose, how I say something, it all helps in reminding cagedmonkey who controls him and his sexual pleasure… Or torment! Then again, much of this is physical, too. There really, truly is a need to feel the physical control. Not that we need to be constantly stroking and edging our guys – though I’m sure they’d love that – but we do need to remind them physically. For those of us using chastity devices, that’s one constant reminder. He can feel that cage you keep locked on him so it is there to say “hey, she holds the key to your cock.”

Sometimes I have to get creative in my reminders. Since we don’t have a lot of time these days for long D/s sessions I need to find interesting ways to keep the tease and denial going. If you follow us on Twitter, you know, a lot of times I’m sending him pictures of myself and my sexy parts. I’m sending him texts about how horny I am and how I’m masturbating. I make sure to remind him of how lucky I am that I’m not locked in a chastity device and I can give myself an orgasm any time I want.

I’ve decided that our lack of alone time together doesn’t mean our D/s or tease and denial time needs to suffer. This morning after getting hubby’s lunch together, I snuck the small vibrator into the front pocket of his lunch bag. Once he left I texted him instructions to retrieve it and click it to a certain setting and place it under his balls, just far enough behind that it vibrated his prostate, for the drive. After a certain amount of time I had him switch it to another setting and then again another. I had control over him for the entire hour that he drove to work. He was an extremely horny dripping mess by the time he got to work. I love that he had to go into work with messy underwear. My little form of private public humiliation.

This little bit of surprise play completely reminded him of how much I love him and love controlling his sexual pleasure. He could feel my control all the way to work and I’m sure the residual submissive feelings are still with him a few hours later. I love finding ways to keep the kink alive, so to speak, when our alone time is not in abundance. I plan to find other wonderfully simple ways to keep reminding him just who is in control of his cock and his sexual pleasure!

After a late night of teasing me and edging me over and over without mercy, My Lady was still not through torturing me.

(By the way, if you haven’t seen her post yet, click on that link… seriously, there is an AMAZING picture of ML’s tits posted there!)

ML once again took advantage of my unlockedness to tease me in the morning… from the very moment I woke up, in fact. She was stroking me, pushing me to yet another frustrating edge. After the edging from the night before, I was beginning to feel like I couldn’t handle any more. My body wanted to cum… my cock NEEDED to cum…. but My Lady wouldn’t allow it.

ML gave me three more edges before it came time for me to head to work. But she wasn’t done with me yet.

One thing I truly appreciate is the level of trust ML and I share in our chastity relationship. ML knows how devoted I am to being a “good boy” for her, so she feels comfortable leaving me unlocked if she is not directly with me – if it suits her needs, which it certainly did today.

ML instructed me to make sure that my cock stayed hard for the entire ride to work, which just happens to last about an hour or so. “Squeeze it, stroke it, do whatever you have to do,” she told me. So I ended up having to play with my cock for the next hour while I drove to work, desperate to cum but not allowed to. When I texted ML that I had gotten to work safely, she demanded three edges from me before I locked myself back up. I had to wait until about a half hour into my shift before I could stuff my poor teased cock back into its cage.

These edges are really driving me crazy! I do enjoy when ML touches me and teases me because it feels so fucking good, but eventually the frustration of being stimulated so much without orgasm begins to be too much. This, of course, is when ML enjoys asserting her control and forcing me to endure even more. I truly do want the teasing to stop at that point, whether she lets me cum or not. But I want it to be her choice – under her control – more than I want it to just happen. So I keep taking as much as she gives me.

What choice do I have?

I was lucky enough to get a day off from work today (although I’m working Saturday, so I’m not that lucky). ML let me sleep a little later than usual, but under one condition – she was going to make things a little “uncomfortable” for me.

My Lady started by applying the leather cuffs to my wrists. She then got a segment of bondage rope and started to wrap it around the base of my cock cage (which was starting to fill up very quickly as she continued to tie me up). Then came the uncomfortable part.

ML ran the rope down below my legs and up between my ass cheeks, all the way up my back and over my shoulders.  She gave it a quick tug, pulling it deep between my ass cheeks, before tying the ends of the rope to my cuffs. She positioned my hands at just above forehead level – not the most comfortable place for them, but any attempt to lower them would cause the rope to dig deeper into my ass.

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Quite the "predicament"!

ML then tucked a small egg vibrator underneath my balls and held it in place with the rope; I began to moan right away. ML quieted me with a deep tongue kiss.

“Get some rest,” she said, “I’ll be back in a bit.”

Get some rest? That wasn’t really possible. It was bad enough just getting in a spot where I was decently comfortable. I’d have no choice but to move my arms when they got tired, but the rope tugged against me and made the base of my cock throb. Add in the fact that I had to endure the constant vibration, and I was dying to be released pretty quickly.

My Lady returned a little while later. She stood over me for a moment, smiling as she enjoyed the torment she arranged for me. Her eyes were locked onto mine as she removed her panties. My entire body shuddered as she climbed up, straddled my face towards my feet, and sat her soaking wet pussy right down on my face.

My face was instantly covered in her juices as she rubbed her pussy all over me. She rode my tongue, pushing it inside her and forcing me to tongue fuck her. I heard her moaning as she adjusted her hips and my tongue slid into her tight asshole. She spread her cheeks apart and pushed down harder to take my tongue deeper in her ass, all while her bouncing pulled the rope deeper into mine. It was really starting to hurt; between my movements and ML’s thrusting against my body, the rope had really started to tighten up on me. I started to whimper, but my cries were muffled by ML’s sexy ass and delicious  pussy. I’m sure she could still hear me, though, because she went faster each time I cried out.

After my face was thoroughly covered in her pussy juice, ML slid her body down until her pussy was right on top of my caged cock. She began rubbing herself against me, grinding her horny pussy right into my cage. I could feel her warmth and wetness between the bars of the Jailbird, and I was getting very desperate to be inside her. I got my wish, but not exactly as I’d hoped; ML took my caged cock and pulled it into her pussy. I tried to stay quiet, but I couldn’t; I moaned loudly as her pussy took my poor tortured cock inside. My Lady grabbed the base of my cock and fucked herself with the cage, effectively jerking my cock at the root as it throbbed helplessly against the steel. She pulled on the rope with each thrust, but this time in a different direction. By the time she got off of me, the rope was fully dug into my sensitive asscrack.

My Lady seemed to be finished tormenting me, but she wasn’t finished pleasing herself. She took her wand and laid down beside me on the bed, head by my feet and vice versa. I had a beautiful view as she spread her legs across my chest and began to rub the wand on her clit. She was moaning and writhing within seconds.

“Ooooh baby,” she moaned, “I bet you wish you could cum like this.” I was too desperate to respond with words. “Finger my pussy while I cum,” she said.

Her pussy was down by my hips, there was no way I could reach that far the way I was tied up. But before I could protest, ML made it clear what had to do.

“Finger my pussy and make my cum, now,” she demanded. “I don’t care if it hurts right now, I just need your fingers inside me.”

I pulled on my cuffs hard, tugging the rope up my ass, but I only made it about 3/4 of the way to her. “Come on,” she wiggled her hips, “make me cum.” I tried harder this time; I pulled the rope as hard as I could, and I yelped in pain as my fingers slid inside her.

“Ohhhh God, yes,” ML moaned. “Deeper, baby, I want it as deep as you can.”

Fuck, what terrible torture this was. ML knows how much I love to make her cum, and she knows how much more I love being her good boy and obeying her demands. But here I was, being forced to pull a bondage rope up between my asscheeks as hard as I possibly could just so I could reach her pussy. I won’t lie, it hurt. It felt like the rope was going to pull right up into my ass, I was tugging so hard. But I had to; I had no choice but to do it because ML wanted it.

It was an amazing feeling – the pain of the rope digging into me, the soft sexy feeling of ML’s pussy squeezing my fingers, the joy of listening to ML get closer and closer to cumming, all mixed together into one moment. Add to that the crushing helplessness of the cage still locked on my desperate cock… It was truly indescribable.

ML came hard, as she usually does when using the wand – her pussy clamped down on my fingers and her legs stiffened as her orgasm exploded though her body. Her legs were pushing me down onto the bed, adding even more pain from the rope. It was all moot though; feeling ML’s intense cum helped me push through the increasing pain with extra threshold to spare.

ML undid the restraints after she came down from her massive orgasm, and now we are back to our normal “parenting” lives… at least on the outside, for me. Inside, my horniness is brewing; there is a semi-subspace feeling fueling this desire more attention from My Lady, whether it be more torture or teasing… whatever she desires. I’m home all day with her today. I wonder if this morning’s amazing experience has filled her appetite, or if it was only an appetizer.

I have the rest of the day to find out.

Getting adjusted to my new schedule is taking some effort. It’s not bad, don’t get me wrong. It’s actually really nice to be able to spend nights at home with ML; she has unlocked me for sex quite often over the past few days, and even allowed me to have an orgasm Monday night (she needed to be fucked hard, and I gladly obliged). Work is just very… different from what I’m used to.

I’m still in the middle of being trained… sort of. I’m also helping out with some supervisory paperwork… kinda. At the moment, I’m here and there; I’m not quite sure where I’m working or what I’m doing specifically yet. I thought maybe I’d get an office which would allow me some semi-privacy and a chance to text/talk with ML. If I’m getting one, I haven’t gotten it yet. In fact, I’ve had less chance to connect with her at work than ever before.

So yeah, it’s an adjustment. Just like living in this new place is. We got ourselves a bed frame to replace the one that got trashed by the movers, and some sexy sheets to boot. Our toys are still packed away, though, which has kept us from getting into any kinky games. Add to the fact that our bedroom door doesn’t really lock (the door can be pulled open, even when it’s locked), and the kids’ bedrooms being on the same floor as ours with no real buffer… any bondage or domination scenes are pretty much out of the question.

The one thing we do have to go on is our chastity play – it’s the one thing we can still hold on to right now. I’ve been meaning to talk to My Lady about what her immediate and longer term plans are for my chastity/denial, but honestly I’m just glad to have this.

Ok well maybe not signed, though someone did ask! 🙂 haha It was like a flash of light that we had the Jail Bird for sale and then it was sold. A nice gentlemen in Utah purchased the Jail Bird, which I found interesting. Last year at Christmas time we sold our Queens Keep device and it was also a guy in Utah that bought that one – not the same one though! 🙂 Hmmm who’s got all these guys in Utah with locked up cocks?

I want to thank our buyer for a great, smooth transaction. The device was shipped USPS Priority Mail with taking and insurance and he should receive it on Friday. I do hope it turns out to be a great fit and that you enjoy being locked up for a long time! Haha

Sorry to those who missed out! I’ll let you know if we are ever selling any other devices!

Our new Jail Bird with the extra cage ring and bigger diameter has already been ordered and now we wait! As timing has it, it will likely be a nice new gift for our new home in West Virginia.

I recently surprised cagedmonkey with a new Mature Metal Jail Bird. I called up and talked to Mistress MM and ordered a different version of the custom device we already have, with a few changes in size as well. I told her all about the surprise I had in mind for cagedmonkey she was extremely helpful in getting the device ordered without him knowing I’d even ordered it.

Way back in 2013 when we ordered our first Jail Bird, we’d ordered the device very similar to the Bird Cage we had been using. We ordered a 2 inch round base ring and a 4 inch long cage that was 1 1/2 inch in diameter. While those measurements worked just fine, after about a month or so we knew exactly what measurements needed some tweaking. That’s when we sent back the device to Mature Metal and William made some adjustments.

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Original Jail Bird BR: 1 7/8" ID: 1 1/2" Length: 3"


When we received the cage back it was all shiny and resized. It now had a 1 & 7/8 inch oval base ring and a 3 inch long cage with the same 1 1/2 inch diameter. That cage has fit perfectly for the past year and a half or so that cagedmonkey has been locked in it. There really is no need for a new cage other than I wanted to try a slightly new look.

When I ordered this new Jail Bird I really liked the idea of adding a ring to the actual cage part as well as making the whole device just a bit more snug. The added ring seems to make CM’s bits slightly less accessible as well as add a neat look to the cage. It still allows for wonderful hygiene though because it’s still a very open style cage. I also ordered him a double base ring with the hopes that it might help add some surface area and hold the cage a little more snug to cagedmonkey’s body.

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New Jail Bird DBR: 1 7/8" ID: 1 3/8" Length: 2 3/4"


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The new cage’s measurements are slightly smaller and tighter than our original but the double base ring is the same 1 7/8″ oval. The cage length is 2 3/4″ and the inside diameter is 1 3/8″. That extra ring on the cage really makes it look like a large difference in size but it’s really not.
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I really do like the look of the new cage when cagedmonkey wears it but alas the new sizing wasn’t exactly a good thing. The new length was probably not an issue at all but the diameter was just a bit too small and cagedmonkey was getting pinched because his skin was sticking out between the bars just enough. There is such a thing as a cage being a little too snug around the shaft. I hear people say all the time how “you really can’t go too short” and I’m not sure I believe that because you really do need a properly fitting device in length and diameter.
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While over all I do love the look of this cage, I want cagedmonkey to be comfortable in the cage he wears for me, or at least most of the time anyway. Granted, the cage can get a bit uncomfortable at times when I make it that way but in everyday wear I want it to be something he can wear all day everyday. It shouldn’t be pinching him or difficult to maneuver or need too much adjusting to use the bathroom. That is something I’ll let cagedmonkey tell you about here.

So what it comes down to is this; we will be selling this new Jail Bird and I will reorder another one exactly the same with the 1 1/2″ inside diameter. If you or anyone you know are looking for a nice Mature Metal device life this and you don’t want to wait on build time, please contact us!

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We are driving back home right now so I thought I’d take a sec to write. Cagedmonkey’s mom’s service was really wonderful. A very long day driving down and being at the funeral home all day and night but still a great time to remember a wonderful woman. We really will miss her. She was such a loving mother and grandma.

Anyway, we had to drive all morning and be at the funeral home in dressy up clothes all day yesterday so I let go of my “no look, no touch” thing slightly. I allowed cagedmonkey to unlock in the morning yesterday and be comfortable and cageless for the day. There certainly was no sexy happenings though with how tired we were, unfortunately.

Now that we will be back home and not traveling for a couple weeks we will get back to the “no look, no touch.” Not that cagedmonkey was all touching himself or even had a hint of a boner but it will still be nice to have him back in his trusty armor! 🙂

Cleaning up the mail box so here is a potpourri of Mail Chastity questions I’ve received. It might end up being a little bit of a longer post. Sorry for the delay in answering any of your questions!

Chris writes:

“I follow your blog some time now. I realy like it.
I plan to buy a steelworkxx looker 1. I am looking for advice on the cockring. I read that people sleep better with a normal ring than with the anatomical ring. The anatomical ring would give a burning/biting feeling. Do you have experience with both of them? What would be your advice?”

I think that the difference between an anatomical ring and a regular one is really a matter of preference. I’ve heard guys swear by its comfort, but I didn’t like it when I wore mine with the Revenge. The curvature at the bottom never seemed to find a comfortable place, and it just didn’t feel right. Now I use just the regular straight ring with the Revenge, and everything feels fine.

My best advice would be to go with what suits you best. If you’re uncomfortable with the anatomical ring, I wouldn’t try to gut it out just because other people do better with it. Try out the regular ring and see how it feels, and then go with whichever is better.

A gentleman from FetLife asks:

“Does chastity hurt as the denial sets in?”

I’m going to answer this in two parts, because it’s a more complicated question than you might realize.

Physically, chastity shouldn’t “hurt” over time as the denial continues. A proper fitting cage with proper hygiene won’t cause any skin irritations; as far as blue balls go, I would consider that more tenderness than actual pain. Yes, they are more sensitive to your normal daily jostling, but it’s not a constant source of discomfort.

Mentally, it definitely comes and goes. During long denial periods I can go from being super psyched (“I’m going to be denied orgasm for three months? That’s crazy!”) to wanting it to end (“I’m not going to have an orgasm for the rest of the summer? That’s HORRIBLE!”). It’s during these times when I’m desperate for relief that it really, truly hurts me when ML says no. After all, the feeling is real; at that moment, I really do want to be done with being denied. It can be a major downer when it seems like she isn’t acknowledging my feelings for release.

At these times, it’s important for me to remind myself that she is acknowleding these feelings… however, she also knows that I crave the feelings that come with absolute submission to her. If she gave in to my needs before she truly wanted to, yes I would get the instant gratification of orgasm, but it would be tainted by later feelings of guilt.

So yes, there is emotional pain that comes with orgasm denial and chastity… but in my opinion, it’s definintely worth suffering through for the intense sexual connection that both My Lady and I get out of it.

What type of device do you prefer?

My personal favorite is the Jailbird. I like the open-style cages the best, because it just looks better in my opinion. I have nothing against the closed-style devices, but ones like the Revenge are a little too “hardcore” for my liking. They require much more stringent upkeep and cleaning practices. Plus, I really do like the way it looks when my cock bulges against the bars of the JB, like it wants to get out so bad that’s it’s trying to break through the steel. 🙂

Can chastity completely remove a desire or ability to orgasm?

Quite the opposite, I’d say! It’s possible to lose the desire to orgasm while in chastity, but I think that would have to do with a mental/psychological issue rather than the chastity itself. Normally, the longer you are locked up and/or denied, the more intense the need for release gets.

With that said, a man’s orgasm may be weakened slightly from long term orgasm denial. The muscles that contract during orgasm may atrophy after a long time of not being used. This would pass after the muscles are re-strengthened (i.e. after you cum lots and lots). I found that you can reduce this effect by doing kegel exercises on a regular basis.

Can chastity be used to modify someone to orgasm by verbal command?

I don’t think that chastity can be used as behavior modification in that way. I’m guessing the only way to achieve that would be through some sort of hypnosis – which I don’t recommend, only because I have absolutely no experience with it, and I wouldn’t want to be responsible for fucking up some guy’s mind so they can’t ever cum again unless he hears the word “watermelon.”

Are there health risks to long term chastity?

Other than possible skin irritations from not having a proper fit, or perhaps injury from laying on the cage the wrong way or something like that, I don’t think there are serious health risks to long term chastity. There is some evidence that orgasm denial is related to a slight increase in prostate problems, but there is also contradictory evidence that says the opposite.

Does chastity affect testicle size long term?

I haven’t experienced any increase in testicle size, at least not permanent – (perhaps during a long denial they may feel or seem swollen, but it’s not a lasting effect. What I have experienced, to quite a degree, is some stretching of my scrotum. I’m naturally a “low hanger,” but after wearing a chastity device for so long – and the repeated erection attempts that often come with longer denials – my balls hang a bit lower than they used to. It’s not a major problem; it’s not like I sit on them on accident or that they drop into the toiler water when I use the bathroom or anything like that. But I guess I would consider that a “side effect” of long term chastity.

Thank you again for all of your questions. Please feel free to write and ask us anything!

ML has decided that she will be using the “no look, no touch” rules for at least the next two weeks whenever I am unlocked. This involves restraining me any time I am out of the cage so that I cannot touch myself, and blindfolding me so that I cannot see my cock. This means that by the time mid-August rolls around, it will be six long weeks since I saw my fully erect cock last. As a little extra mental dig, she has mentioned that she plans to take many pics and vids of my cock as she teases me. She may or may not let me see them, which means that readers of our blog as well as our Twitter followers may see my cock a lot more than I will get to.

This apparently won’t be the first thing our followers know more about than I do. But I’ll get to that soon enough.

ML started tonight off by having me lay on the floor, cuffing my hands above my head around the leg of the side table, and blindfolding me. She then began attending to the task of freeing my cock from its steel prison for the first time in a month. I could feel myself get hard almost instantly after I was unlocked. It felt so wonderful just to be able to get full and hard; the simple things are the most pleasant when you’ve been denied of them for so long. ML began gently cleaning my cock with a wet towel, giving me playful strokes and teases as she cleaned me. I was moaning and rolling on the floor within seconds. Her touch was absolutely incredible. Once I was well cleaned, she applied some lotion to my shaft – “to make sure the skin stays in good condition while it’s locked up,” ML explained. I didn’t give a fuck what excuse she made up, mainly because she was stroking my cock for the first time in weeks. She was edging me with almost no effort at all as I thrusted up into her hand, unable to control my body as my lust and need burned hotter by the moment.

My Lady stopped stroking me abruptly; she needed to give me enough time to get soft so she could get me locked up again. It took quite a while for my erection to subside… apparently, after nearly a month of not being able to get hard, my cock didn’t want to give up on it so quickly! Eventually, my cock softened enough to allow ML to stuff me into the cage.

I felt ML put the cage back on, fighting the rapidly swelling flesh as she got the security screw in place. She took the blindfold off of me and told me to look. I peeked down at my cock, and as sure as I expected, I was locked up again – my first of many missed chances to see myself hard.

“Well?” My Lady asked. I shrugged and was about to tell her that I wished I could have seen myself hard before getting locked up again, but she interrupted me. “Look again,” she said.

I looked down again at my caged cock, same as it was…. only this time, I saw it.
It wasn’t the Jailbird!

I should be more accurate and say “it wasn’t the Jailbird I’m used to wearing,” because it was a Jailbird, except it was different. This one had a second crossbar about midway down the shaft, and the base ring was a double instead of the usual single. My Lady surprised me with a new cage! My Lady explained that this JB was also smalled width-wise, so my cock would have even less room than I’ve been used to in the past. She also hopes that the double ring will help alleviate some of the “pulling away” issues I have when I am extremely aroused while wearing the cage.

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Surprise! Although I suspect most readers/followers aren’t THAT surprised, as ML mentioned that she’s been talking about ordering this new cage on Twitter for a while now, unbeknownst to me. So, screw all of you for hiding it from me.  🙂

As far as the cage goes, comfort-wise… it’s different. It’s not bad or anything, but I can definitely sense a difference between the two models. I can feel that the cage section is narrower, and I think I can feel the double ring when I walk. It doesn’t hurt, but I’m aware of it. It’s not like the old JB, which on occasions I forgot whether or not I was wearing it (I usually was). Adjusting myself is also a slight challenge, as the new crossbar is right where I would normall grab for leverage.

With all of that said, I am the person who can’t continue walking if I have a fuzzy in my sock, so I’m pretty sure I will asjust to the new cage as time passes.