cock cage

All posts tagged cock cage

My Lady recently posted on a common dilema that keyholders face: do they want their sub to be so desperate that he will disobey his domme? It’s a very interesting take, and I completely understand where she is coming from.  Speaking for myself, I’m not the type to go against my keyholder. I absolutely LOVE being subjected to her desires, servicing her needs, and partaking in her pleasure. Nothing turns me on more than pleasing My Lady. I would probably need some sort of signal from her to indicate her mood, otherwise I would most likely obey her to the ends of the earth. After all, isn’t that what I got into this for?

I don’t mean to offend anyone, but I never really understood the purpose of an “anti-pullout” feature on a chastity device. I get the idea of increased security leading to a more complete chastity experience, but an anti-pullout device really shouldn’t be necessary. First of all, if you need to be prevented from pulling out that badly, you’re going to find another way to get out of your cage. Even the best designed anti-pullout can be defeated with a little determination… and a fair bit of pain, I would assume! Second of all, if you need to be prevented from pulling out that badly, it probably means that you aren’t ready for the realities of giving over complete control in a chastity situation. Nobody out there has “accidentally” slipped out of their cage; it’s a deliberate action to disobey your keyholder.

Why would a man in chastity want to purposefully disobey his keyholder? In my opinion, these are guys who are still trying to cling to some sense of control over their situation – “topping from the bottom,” as it were. These are the guys who tell their keyholder what they want to have done to them, and throw a tantrum when they don’t get it. These are the guys who lock themselves in a device without the request of their keyholder.  They aren’t ready to hand over full and complete control to their keyholder.

And you know what? It’s okay! It’s okay if you are one of those guys. Nobody should enter a full, indefinite chastity lifestyle (like the one My Lady and I live) without considering their true feelings about being powerless. Communication between the sub and keyholder about these feelings is important so both can find common ground to start on. If you don’t start off on the same page, resentment can build in the relationship. And resentment is a total turnoff.

Time again for another round of “Mail Chastity” where we tackle the topics that are on your mind. As always, these are real questions from real readers. Feel free to email us with any questions you may have; your question just may be featured in our next Mail Chastity post!

Click on the contact page in the top left corner for email info, or simply just to see a great pic of My Lady’s beautiful breasts perfectly framing the key to my chastity cage.  😉

Q: Are there any medical concerns involved with being locked up so frequently?

Hmmmm….. good question. There are some medical issues that should be addressed when considering long term and/or frequent wearing of a chastity device. Most of these issues are not very severe if tended to.

The most common occurrence would be skin irritation where the cage sits, either around the scrotum or on the shaft of the penis. This can be avoided by using a properly fitting cage and proper lubrication to allow movement of the cage while walking. Skin irritation, if left unchecked, can lead to blisters and skin ulcers which risk being infected. You don’t want that.

Another common condition that is often seen with open-style devices (Birdcage/Jailbird/etc.) is edema, or localized swelling due to fluid buildup. This happens when the penile tissue expands into the open spaces of the cage. This isn’t the “hardon bulge” I’m talking about… that is completely normal, especially when your keyholder is deliberately turning you into a sex-crazed lunatic. Edema occurs when your erection goes away, but the swelling and fluid remain. This can be fixed by rubbing and massaging the area to promote circulation… just be careful not to enjoy it TOO much and piss off your keyholder! Edema, when not dealt with in time, can cause tissue damage and possible erectile dysfunction if it becomes serious enough.

The issues I have described in the linked posts were not related directly to wearing the chastity device. There were… ahem… other factors involved.

Q: How does chastity effect the day-to-day basis of your life?

To be honest, not all that much. The main difference is that I get crazy horny as time goes on. Duh. Other than that, the cage doesn’t get in the way much. I can play with my children without incident – I try to avoid having them sit on my lap, but they are old enough now where that’s not a big worry. Work is not a problem, even though my job requires frequent walks around the room, as well as sitting and standing. Other than the fact that I’m goddamn-motherfucking-all-batshit-flames-of-hell horny all the time, my life proceeds pretty much in a normal fashion.

Q: How do you decide what to post? Is it a joint effort?

My Lady does most of the posting on the blog, for two reasons. First, she is a major control freak… which she will freely admit, hence the FLR lifestyle. Second, she usually has the most time to post, given that she is a stay-at-home mom with a Galaxy Note 2 surgically attached to her hand. However, we both collaborate on what themes and ideas to post about. Very often, we will be discussing a particular aspect of our lifestyle, and either of us will say, “We should totally write a blog post about this.” She usually just beats me to the punch. We do really enjoy doing the “He Said, She Said” and “Conversations” posts… they are lots of fun, and they give our readers great insight on the types of conversations we have and that we consider necessary in order make this lifestyle run smoothly.

As you may have read in an earlier post, My Lady recently had shoulder surgery that has left her with pretty much only one functional arm for the next few weeks. I’ve been waiting on her hand and foot (and toes!) for a couple of days now; it has been rough working so hard for her, but thing are settling into a groove. She is starting to feel better, as well as slowly returning to her “insatiably horny and wet all day every day” status. 🙂

Over the past few days, I have realized that I truly am at peace when I am serving ML. Sexual service is obviously more exciting, however serving her in non-sexual ways also gives me an energy from within. Most importantly,  I thrive on her feedback; it was rough going when she was in pain and feeling terrible, but it is getting better as her mood is improving. I live to hear those words “such a good boy” escape those sexy lips.

I have spent most of the past week unlocked, however I have still been denied an orgasm (still cum-less in 2014!). As ML’s physical comfort has allowed, I have been pleasing her with my tongue, hands, and also with my cock. She has mentioned on quite a few occasions that I feel exceptionally large this week. While I’m not the type to figure out exactly why I’m receiving these AWESOME comments – what guy doesn’t want to hear they have a huge cock? – it may be due to the fact that the frequency of penetrative sex has been less leading up to now. All bragging aside, I have somehow managed to hold myself off from cumming during this time. I can’t count how many times I’ve WANTED to shoot my load of cum deep in her wet warm pussy, but so far I’ve been that “good boy” that I strive to be.

What exactly makes some of us sub males so dedicated to our keyholders that we are willing to be SO committed to our chastity and orgasm denial? Why do some men need anti-pullout features on their chastity devices, while others can fuck their KH without going over the edge?

I can’t speak for everyone, but for me it’s that I am fully focused on My Lady’s pleasure. She gets off on the control she has over me, and I get off on her controlling me. I know that she would be extremely disappointed if I were to cum without permission (unless she forced me to, but that’s a different story). For me, it’s about giving My Lady what she desires. And what she desires is a man who will allow himself to be denied indefinitely until she wants to please him, and who will serve her every need until that moment occurs.

She wants a good boy. And I want that to be me. 🙂

Sorry, ACDC, but you have nothing to complain about here. Call me when you’ve been locked in a chastity cage and denied orgasm for over two weeks.

My balls are really starting to swell up HUGE. My Lady has kept me in the Jailbird for over two weeks now with minimal time out and absolutely no orgasms. I have spent plenty of time pleasing her and she has spent plenty of time teasing me. And now my balls are significantly larger than I’ve noticed in the past. I actually have to make sure I’m not peeing on them when it’s time to urinate!

I’m not sure of the specific cause of this. Part of it is almost certainly being denied orgasms or draining of any cum whatsoever, as ML has not milked me at all during this latest stretch. I’m pretty much leaking precum constantly at this point, but that is nowhere near achieving the draining I need so badly. I am sure that when (if?) ML lets me cum on Christmas, it is going to be an extremely heavy load. 🙂

I’m also wondering if my balls are looking bigger because my scrotum is being pulled by the cage. When ML teases me, my attempted erection pushes the cage up pretty far on “the equipment” down there, giving the skin around my balls a pretty good stretch. I feel a lot less discomfort with the JB than I did in the Birdcage, but the pull is still pretty strong. During these times, my balls feel large and extremely full, and they turn a deep shade of red. All is well as far as circulation goes – ML has taken a liking to massaging them in this state to make sure blood flow is acceptable (at least that’s her excuse).

My gigantic balls are probably a result of both factors – storing up a large load of cum waiting to be released, and the tight squeezing from the cage every time the cock tries to assert itself. One thing is for sure – they are very sensitive in this state, and I often find it impossible to hold back my moans when ML rubs them. She takes quite delight in that!

When My Lady and I decided to give male chastity a try, I was very excited. I wanted to jump in right away. Neither of us really knew what to expect and which details were going to be important. Only when ML and I chose to get a device did I realize how big of a change this was going to be.

“I’m going to have to buy a whole new wardrobe,” I thought.

When we were looking through device styles, I couldn’t figure out how I was supposed to wear one of those things without everybody I walk by noticing a humongous bulge in my pants. The pictures of the devices made it look like they stuck out quite prominently. And, not to brag or anything, but my size would require us getting a pretty big cage. I knew for sure it would be visible in my current comfortable fitting pants.

Then we got the Birdcage. I tried it on, put on my clothes, and….

“Where the fuck did it go?” There was a slight bulge in the crotch of my pants, but it was only visible to me because I was looking for it.

I was amazed. I hadn’t thought of the fact that these cages were designed to be worn discreetly, and were made specifically to not obnoxiously stick out for public viewing. Even when I tried to get hard in the cage, there was no appreciable bulge. I was in better shape than going sans-cage!

I was also relieved. I wanted chastity, but I didn’t want to have to go buy a ton of clothes for it. And I didn’t want to half ass my chastity, wearing it around the house but not in public. So it was a great relief to find out that neither of those measures were necessary.

And now my custom Jailbird hides even better! Here is a pic of me in undies (SHIELD YOUR EYES!!!!):
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You can make out the bars if you look closely, but that’s only one layer of clothing. Plus, who is going to be looking at my crotch trying to find a bulge? As ML put it once, they may think to themselves, “damn, that guy is packing a huge cock” and go along with their day.   🙂

Since this revelation, I’ve learned to go with the flow concerning the male chastity lifestyle. ML and I are fully committed to making this work, and we will find a way to tackle any problems that may arise.

I used to feel the same way.

There was a time when I was younger that my main kink was tease & orgasm denial. I was very turned on by the idea of being brought to the edge of orgasm over and over, but not be allowed to cum – for hours or even days at a time. Bondage, of course, came along with this as well, reinforcing the idea that I was dependent on the woman teasing me to give me an orgasm when she desired.

While indulging in my fantasies by reading stories and such, I would frequently come across the subject of male chastity. I didn’t quite get it. “I want to be teased, not left alone and ignored!” was my thought process. I wanted the woman to play with me, drive me crazy, and make me beg to cum. How was that supposed to happen with my cock locked away in a contraption that kept it from being touched?

I’m not sure when the tide began to turn, but the sense of control started to fascinate me. My OD fetish was basically a control fetish – giving up control of my orgasm to someone else. Male chastity had the same principles, only more so – not only would my orgasm be under control of someone else, but also my ability to touch myself, even the ability to simply get hard would be taken from me. And isn’t male chastity just a more personal, more intense, constant form of bondage?

THAT was when it really clicked for me.

I could not fathom what that must feel like – to be crazy horny and turned on, and yet not be able to do anything about it. Forget having an orgasm, even having an erection is not possible when in chastity. Could I handle it? Could I go weeks without an erection? Months?

And I will tell you this…. the feeling is even more mind blowing that I thought it could be.

I am still amazed and thrilled by the amount of power My Lady has over my sexuality. I only get hard when and if she allows it. I only get to feel the soft walls of her warm, wet pussy when she desires it. I only get to cum when she wants me to. And there is nothing I can do about it, besides beg and plead and accept her answer. Meanwhile, she gets to cum whenever and however she demands.

There are days I still look down and see the cage locked onto me, and I think, “Jesus, this is fucking CRAZY!” But, honestly, there is no other way I would rather have it. Ironically, her control over me gives me the freedom to focus on pleasing her. I know that if and when I’m allowed to fuck ML and cum deep inside her, I will have earned it through my devotion to her.

I’m not sure if it’s a good thing or a bad thing, but I’m starting to get used to wearing the cage for extended periods of time.

This week in particular has flown by pretty quickly. Both My Lady and I have been slightly preoccupied with RL things, but I still can’t deny that wearing the cage is starting to feel normal. I’ve been in the BC since Tuesday, and I swear it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still as horny as hell. What I mean is that I’m not sitting around thinking about how long the cage has been on because it feels like it’s been a long time. It’s just another part of my life now.

Obviously, getting more comfortable wearing the cage for extended periods is a good thing…. in theory. In practice? It could end up being bad for me, at least for my sanity. If ML decides that, due to my newfound comfort in extended lockup periods, that she wants to push me even further than before and take a step up in scale from weeks to months… will I be able to handle that?

Will I even have a choice???

I admit, I do not have extensive experience with chastity devices. The only device I’ve ever worn besides the one I am currently wearing was an “off the shelf” Birdcage. I did want to give my impressions on my newest device, a custom made Jailbird from Mature Metal. Most of my comparisons will be against the Birdcage, but some of my comments will just be what they are, not a comparison to anything.

For starters, the device is very cool looking. After My Lady and I initially settled on the Birdcage, we really started to enjoy the look of a steel cage. The Jailbird is very stylish and also very sturdy. The cage is well put together, with no spurs or pinch points that I have found so far. There have been a few occasions where pubic hair has gotten caught in various places, but I think that’s more of a result of me needing a trim than the device itself. The device is slightly wider than the Birdcage. It feels like it should be heavier as well, but it is actually lighter due to the material it is made out of (surgical steel vs. chrome plated steel).

I was surprised by how freaking comfortable this thing is! The Birdcage was very comfortable, but this Jailbird is seriously amazing. It might have to do with the fact that we ordered the oval base ring. I happen to be blessed (cursed?) with rather large testicles, and the oval ring gives them more room to breathe without allowing them to slip backwards. I think the better fitting oval ring also prevents the cage from pushing upwards when the cock attempts an erection. This was a MAJOR issue with the Birdcage, to the point where it would cause near- debilitating pain. Sure, the Jailbird is not exactly comfortable when it squeezes my balls upward as the cock tries in vain to get hard, but it’s not nearly as bad as the Birdcage.

Speaking of trying to get hard… the bars of the Jailbird are just a tiny bit thicker than the bars of the Birdcage. It’s almost hard to tell – ML insisted that I was wrong, but trust me, I’m the one wearing it and I can tell.  🙂  This comes into play when the cock gets hard and tries to press through the cage. The bars of the Birdcage sometimes felt as though they could dig into my skin. They didn’t, but I swear sometimes I got so hard in the cage it felt like it was possible! This is not a problem with the Jailbird. The bars are wide enough to distribute the and reduce the pressure. The bars are also wider apart which reduces the amount of protrusion that happens when the cock presses against the cage (when the cock would bulge out between the bars and rub on my clothing, it would cause an oversensitive pain-ish sensation… not good). The wider arrangement of the bars also allows ML better access to torture her desperate prisoner.

Overall, the comfort of the custom measurements is just one feature that makes the Jailbird a great chastity device. My cage needs to be tweaked just a bit; ML and I have decided that her cock has too much room in the cage and we must shorten the length of the shaft by about an inch. This adjustment will cost a little bit, but it is important to invest in quality when using a device for extended periods of time. For anyone participating in prolonged 24/7 chastity and are looking at this style of device (steel, open shaft), I would highly recommend the Jailbird. Even with a price tag upwards of $300, it is definitely worth the cost.

On October 25th I placed my order to Mature Metal for my cagedmonkey’s (cm) custom chastity device. I decided on the Jail Bird style because it is very similar to what we have now and I really love seeing how the penis squishes through the bars!

I will tell you that it took a few days to a week of measuring several times at several times of day to make sure what we were measuring was correct. I even snuck in while cm was sleeping and measured him then! Hehe 🙂 when measuring it is important to get the true flaccid length and its best to order the sizing rings from Mature Metal. For $20 it’s well worth it if you want to order the correct size for your device. The sizing rings are usually sent out very quickly (ours were sent out the next business day). The sizes you need to know when ordering are flaccid length, circumference or more importantly the diameter of the penis shaft for the cage and diameter of the base ring.

***edited to add: I wanted to come and make sure to note that since receiving the JB and having cagedmonkey wearing it I notice that the curved length of his flaccid penis is not quite the same as the straight length. I’ll suggest using a piece of string to measure it with a bit of a curve (at least for someone with a longer flaccid penis) or quite simply you could measure straight hanging down but subtract a half an inch at least. That might save you the need to have an adjustment made.

Today our Jail Bird got delivered! It is usually a 6-8 week wait for William at Mature Metal to custom make your device and get it sent out. I was pleasantly surprised to find out last Friday from Mistress MM that our device was being mailed out already! So very exciting! When our package arrived it was in a USPS Priority Mail box which meant it had a tracking number. So fantastic when you’re a bit addicted to the postal mail as I am! I just love getting mail! Once I opened the box I was very pleased to see such care taken in packaging & shipping. The cage itself comes in a pretty red velvet bag and the ring along side in a little plastic zipper bag. It’s padded in the box by some sexy black tissue paper too.
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The cage itself seems to be an amazing piece of work! At first inspection it looks to be extremely well constructed, free from any metal dust and feels smooth to the touch with no sharp or uneven edges.

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Of course once my cagedmonkey is locked in it he will have to review the whole wearing part of this device. This order process and wait time have been nothing short of awesome. I look forward to doing business with Mistress MM and William in the future. I already know, for variety, we plan to order another type of device. I’m not sure which I’ll choose but I’ll be sure to let you all know when I do!

I’m so excited right now and can’t wait for hubby too wake up so I can switch him out of the Bird Cage and get him in his custom cage. There he will be staying until at least Christmas! 😀